Monday Jukebox Wonders What Was Norway Like in 1975?

Judging by the entries from that year's MGP (held in February), it must've been a fun place.

First off Hastverk (Hurry), first performed by that Ja(h)n Teigen:



And secondly by his one-time other half Anita Skorgan (her performance compared to Teigen's makes you wonder if they were kind of a Norwegian precursor to Whitney & Bobby)



And then there's Voodoo, first "performed" by (the loud and not-necessarily on key--at least to my ears) Gudny Aspaas* & Il Teigen:

*Listen to Gudny's version of Mata Hari, the eventual winning song, as performed by Anne Karine Strøm, who must've passed on the drugs to her costumer.



Later in the show Il Teigen dropped his band (who were playing backup for the first round performances) and performed the song with uber-innocent Inger-Lise Rypdal, exchanging psychedelic rock for campy progressive symphonic rock.




By the way, wouldn't be fun if NRK brought back this format of small band versus full orchestra versions of each entry? (I know we live in a backing track world, but we also live in a remix silly one.)

Many thanks to Euroencyclopedia on Youtube.

Is it because of the beer?

Not to be flip about terrorism, but apparently there may have been several terrorist dry runs at US airports...including (brace yourselves) Milwaukee.

San Diego, I understand. (Navy)

Houston, I understand. (Oil)

Baltimore, I understand. (Close to Washington)

Milwaukee, quite frankly, ain't got jack except for TV nostalgia...and it's not that close to Chicago the way Baltimore is to Washington.

Monday Jukebox Does One for The Road

What better send off than with Big Mama?

(Somebody give these women the international career they deserve!)

First off Sister:




And because we must always end upbeat: Nevermind



See you later this month!

From The "Modern Politics Are Absurd" Department

("Broken Clock" division.)

Most people believe Cheney needs to go...that's the good news.

Several of the Right-winger reasons why are seemingly straight from Lewis Carroll.

That's the bad (as in "head-smacking, what dimension am I living in?") news.

Ah for the days of "Fuddle Duddle!"

A Half-Hour in New-Age Pseudo-Christian Happiness

A half-hour because that is all I could take.

Upon entering a hall full of Benetton ads come to life sitting in the chairs, 4 people in business casual sang some rousing song that I'm surprised The Polyphonic Spree hasn't done yet.

The Benettons clap along wide-eyed, and few of them claim to get the spirit. My fellow undercover agent said that the sincerity of everyone clapping must be taken with a grain of salt, as this is a popular place of worship for actors (in Chelsea? Chorus Boys! Both young and old.)

A woman then gets onstage and relates some long-winded spiel about membership and commitment (somehow involving her leaving her marriage), which is the sign for all new members to embrass themselves publicly, and for everyone else to turn to everyone nearby and say "welcome."

I did not stand up, nor did my undercover agent. It's better not to get close to people who so eagerly fake sincerity.

The Polyphonic 4 get onstage again and sing some daft ditty that gets more people stirred, or at least wanting to appear that they are stirred. It's The PTL in the middle of Chelsea.

The Polyphonic 4 then lead the congregation in a "Meditation" as the lights go down.

It got all too Saint Germain (the kooky mystical religion that took over my father after he went crazy in the early 1990s) for me, so the two of us promptly left to go get drunk and have a cigarette.

Lucky Saturday Jukebox Pays Twice

Combining the two obsessions of this corner of the internet: here is LaGaylia Frazier's It's In The Stars, which competed in Melodifestivalen 2004 (aka the year when Miss Ph kicked everybody else's ass) :




The song was subsquently "covered" by squeaking-their-way through puberty w-inds.

W-inds - It's in the stars

LaGaylia has a slight edge on the tweens in my opinion, but they have more flash (and no 3 minute limit).

Lucky Saturday Jukebox Says Puberty Is Mean

...especially when you're in a Japanese boyband.

Case point: w-inds

Here they are in 2001:

W-inds - Feel the Fate

(Racial harmony via happy-go-lucky Japanese Tween Pop?)

And here they are this year (with the Japanese image song from Shrek 3)

W-inds - Love is the Greatest Thing [PV]

Better beats, (arguably) better choreography, but wouldn't you hate to try to hit those notes all career-long?

Coming Attractions: Hikaru Goes To Church

This Sunday, Fearless Leader Goes to Church.

Seriously, I am attending church.

Now, granted this is one of those funky new-age churches which is very accepting of gays (it's even got a gay preacher), but nonetheless my happily secular-reared self is attending church!

How weird is that?

Perhaps the hilarity stems more from the fact that all these feel-good places are interested more in your wallet than your spiritual growth. I'm an avowed Taoist if anything, so the notion that people have to be reminded by some high and mighty that it's alright to be one's self is already absurdly funny to me. The fact that they need a pack mentality rife full of consumerism in addition to that is even funnier.

Yet, I am going to go with a shred of an open mind...and 4 Smirnoff Ices in my stomach.

If you build it they will come...

Really, they will...We're certain of that...Well, who are they exactly?*

* I haven't lost my mind, but like a broken clock, the Sun can occasionally be right.

Why I Still Love Elliot (Spitzer)

He doesn't just call them like he sees them, he calls them out.

Recess until January? That's just wrong.

Pride 2007

This is what it means to be out.

And this is why it matters to march.

Take That Revival at Hikaruland: Sure & Could It Be Magic

Little known "fact": The video for Sure was a saving-face measure after C4 said no to the pilot for a Take That sitcom. It would've given AbFab a run for its money, what with Robbie playing an M & S & S & M queen (Is Mark his Master?), Mark trying to keep the lads from going to court over child endangerment, Gary coming up with cute little melodies, and Jason & Howard doing...something.

Again with the video having nothing to do with the lyrics in the song. In fact the theme here is how often can we see Mark Owen's bare torso and Robbie Williams look alternatively petrified and deliriously happy. At least we're spared Gary Barlow dancing...for the most part.

Take That Revival at Hikaruland: I Found Heaven & Everything Changes

Continuing the Take That revival theme.

1. Interesting how they look pissed off for half of the video, and beaming for the other half.
2. What's with the liberal bare-chested shots of Gary, Howard, Mark? (I understand Howard & Mark, but why Gary? And hell, why not Jason & Robbie for that matter?)
3. The video does look like it should be the theme song to Lie Down With Dogs.
4. The hair! The hair! Gary Barlow is not Dolph Lundgren.

Several things:

1. What the hell does the video have to do with the song? Exactly whom are they saying doesn't change?
2. Why is a group of young British men from 1995 invading a Lower East Side cafe circa 1920? Why aren't the regulars pissed off? I'd be if my pleasant afternoon was shattered by a bunch of people prancing around telling me that I haven't changed.
3. Gary Barlow isn't dancing!
4. Robbie must've thanked his lucky stars that he didn't have to sing this live, that's one brutal falsetto.
5. Shot on the same day with the same extras? Kylie Minogue's video for Give Me Just A Little More Time.

Take That Revival here at Hikaruland

Quite unexpectedly, I'm in the midst of a Take That nostalgia kick, spurred on by seeing the documentary that was released last year.

Very interesting stuff, I must say.

Some observations:

• Gary Barlow hit the wall...hard, none of the others did.
• I don't care what sort of justification Robbie Williams came up with, he damn well should've gone to the reunion.
• Mark Owen still looks 12.
• They really did market Howard as the sex symbol of the group, though he never really did it for me.

And the most interesting one:

• For the love of god, when the hell is Jason Orange going to come out? It looked like he was on the verge of saying it through the whole show: the gender-nonspecific pronouns, the aimless journey in search of himself, the fact that he appeared to have no love life whatsoever, and using Lulu as a beard!

It says something when Mr. Out & In [the closet] Robbie Williams comes across as more accepting of his sexuality than poor Jason.

By the way, what the hell went on between him & Robbie? That tiff between them sounded like something way more personal than just bandmates having friction. You don't get that sort of enmity without some serious deep feelings being tread upon.

The Idiot Mayor Gets A Clue

...and changes his political affilation.

Shame he didn't do it in 2004, when it would've really mattered to everyone living in 4 mile radius of Madison Square Garden!

2007 Tony "Post-Mortem": The Quest for Relevance

Not really a genuine post-mortem since the show is still going on as I type this, however, the winners this year seem to be very predictable and for the most part deserving (although Coast of Utopia: Molitva at this year's Eurovision in my view), so I'm wrapping it up with 20 minutes to go.

Supposedly, this is the last year that CBS is broadcasting the show, and I almost think this is a good thing, as the Tonys struggle to find some type of relevance in a world that has largely passed them by.

I'll get back to that cerebral thought in a moment, but first...

My god, I cannot believe that there hasn't been a duff winner yet.

• Spring Awakening seems to be deservedly sweeping every category its nominated in.
• Julie White won against all odds, however, if you saw her in Little Dog, this is no surprise. She was that good. As much as I despise Douglas Carter Beane as a writer (particularly in terms of plot), he can write amazing monologues and female characters...he just bombs badly in every other aspect.
• Mary Louise Wilson gave the best acceptance speech so far: "This was not a surprise."
• Bill T. Jones came very close to Wilson for best acceptance speech (certainly won it for best winner's walk to the podium).
• A special award should go to Eddie Izzard as presenter for Special Theatrical Event (aka the most boring category imaginable). I don't know if he was scripted or ad-libbing, but it was probably inherently better than the two nominees in that category. (Kiki & Herb were robbed, even though they probably didn't stand a chance, but they would've won that knife fight.)

Now to the negativity.

I don't get the accolades for Coast of Utopia but I reckon it has more to do with people wanting to appear smart rather than for the play itself.

We all understand that the Tonys are televised more out of tradition rather than for ratings, but the way that everything is synergised for maximum cross-referencing is just dire. Try as hard as they might, Viva Laughlin will likely not become more than a mere footnote for the 2007-08 season, and a camp/cult rerun 5 years after, no matter how much they hype up Hugh Jackman & Melanie Griffith.

Yet, that's not the worst part. That dubious honour goes to this year's tagline: "There's A Little Bit of Broadway in Everyone."

Christ on a stick, that is stupid as hell.

The last thing I want to see or hear is some random bleach blonde bimbette claiming how she loved going to see Cats when she was young...all of 2 minutes ago.

"Broadway" is near death, praise god. Let the new theatrical phoenix arise.

Update: Tonight's only shocker was the newly out David Hyde Pierce winning Best Actor. What the hell was that? And the newly divorced Taye Diggs & Idina Menzel co-presenting...that was most definitely odd.

Hey Kettles, You're Black Too!

Bob Gedlof and Bono say that Canada is slumping on aid to Africa.

While that may very well be true under Prime Idiot Harper, let us not forget that here are two very wealthy men (one of whom tax dodges, at least according to the Daily Record, which while no Independent nor Guardian, is at least not The Sun) telling a nation to fork over more money.

Gold card/Khaki Socialism is one thing, but this is just ludicrous.

Normal Service Will Be Resumed Soon

Moving is such fun!

Endemol, what hath you wrought?

They're competing not over a million Euros.

Not over a trip around the world.

Not over a dream home.

They are competing over a healthy kidney.

As we edge closer and closer towards Battle Royale for real. Who Wants To Marry A Millionaire looks considerably tasteful.

Saturday Jukebox Says Sometimes You Can Be Too Tacky

Case in point, this year's Austrian entry:

2007 Austria (Semifinal)
Uploaded by Galiza

Dancing AIDS ribbons? Dancing AIDS ribbons?