Now this is a Corporate Holiday Greeting

Happy Holidays from Air New Zealand...

I don't think you'd see any US airline or corporation for that matter be this saucy in their greetings.

Happy Holidays, Palindrome

The 1,111th post at this corner of the Internet warmly wishes you a pleasant seasonal celebration.

A holiday thought:

The New Delta: Pan Am redux? I don't think so.

The Flying Roo Stole Christmas

Boy, does Qantas have its work cut out for them, at least in terms of public relations.

Today's latest shot to the heart (or pouch, as it were) is a story in the Sydney Morning Herald which discusses how Qantas lost 750 pieces of luggage on several very important routes, including London - Sydney. 

Ouch.

Eurovision 2009: Albania - What It Is and What It Nearly Was

Albania decided their Eurovision entry, and it seems the elfin-looking but deep-voiced Kejsi Tola won with a song that looks extremely difficult for non-Albanian speakers to pronounce. 

I think there's a fair chance of that song title getting translated before Spring.

 

Just 8 points separated Kejsi and 3rd placers West Side Family who sought to give Albanian rap its due. I'll let the visual and aural tell their own story.

At the other end of the spectrum was Soni Malaj who came in 16th with Zona Zero. Now she's pretty and can hold something approaching a tune, but I think she needs to shoot her choreographer as the Trampettes are upstaging her with some unintentional comedy.

Jukebox Videos of the Year: Act 2

So we have 6 remaining, so let's strike one off the list already. The lyrics are indecipherable (and I'd be willing to bet intentionally so), the orchestration is jarring and aggressive, the driving force of the duo shares my birthday...all indications were that capsule were going to take one of the spots of Jukebox of the year, but alas JUMPER didn't make that last jump to the top.

Now onto the second recipient of the Punctured Eardrum Award. Number Two is, and quite likely will always be judged as the PEA winner against whom all winners will be placed against. He didn't get the #1 slot because Ala/en got there first, but this guy is no tortoise. People, give it up for Kosuke Atari:

A very mellow eeeeeee for Mr. Atari.

Back to the main race, and it is time to elimate another two contenders. 

Oriental Funk Stew probably had a bit of a longshot at making it to JotY status, being so newly jukeboxed, but it was a valiant effort and I'd be willing to bet that they will make many more journeys there in times to come.

Appropriately that leads to another elimination, albeit from one of the older entries. Sadly, Jason Walker--like capsule--got very close to taking the top spots too.

He will also be a frequent visitor to the Jukebox if there is any justice in the video world.

Let's see who's left:

• Frau Peters
• DOUBLE & Namie Amuro
• Die Deutscher Boyz

Will it be a Teutonic sweep of the top? Nein.

Citizens, here are the first winners of Jukebox of the Year:

(the patience while buffering will be worth it)

It is only purely coincidental that the first ever winners happen to be on non-Youtube sites. 

It is not coincidental that they also happen to be the most fierce, kick ass, and all out performances. 

Coming within the fortnight: The Year That It Was On Here 2008.

Jukebox Videos of the Year: Act 1

In true awards style wherein the big awards are held out to the very end, so shall it be with Jukebox Videos of the Year.

That being said, at least the wait won't feel like decades have passed. (In fact, come here after midnight and it'll go by in no time at all.) 

Let's get the ball rolling with an award that as already been known, The Punctured Eardrum.

Sponsored by Hothands...because just buying a simple pair of gloves is too taxing on the brain.

The first recipient is Alan/Alen Hrzica.

And I finally realised who Ala/en reminds me of: Dermot O'Leary.

Was there some secret Anglo-Irish-Croatian dalliance in the past?

And now here are two nominees who are now sadly out of the running.

From the Danish Eurovision Retrospective:

From the late lamented* Thursday Jukebox SMAPs You Upside The Head:

* (damn dead video links)

Since it is Sunday morning, I won't make any innuendo surrounding TAKE OFF...Oh hell, performing a song with a refrain that goes "TAKE OFF!" while wearing skintight suits is very Chippendales-esque in execution even if that may not have been the intention. 

That leaves 6 entries still in contention: DOUBLE & Namie Amuro do the Ho Stroll,  Dem Deutscher Boyz, the Funk Stew from Korea, capsule's precient summary of the US election results, Jason "skinny white boys can sing house music dammit" Walker, and Ingrid...Frau Peters if you're nasty.

Tune in at 4 PM today for Act 2: Still Mike Woods-free and lovin' it!

A Belated Apology or How I learned to dress for the connecting city

I was reading a thread on Airliners.net about "Most annoying passengers" and they mentioned body odour. 

Well, I should take this moment to apologise to my seatmate on the delayed 1:55 pm flight from Atlanta to Milwaukee this past Friday evening, plus anyone who came close to me at Hartsfield-Jackson.

Here's the story:

I thought that a warm wool sweater (with no undershirt) was the perfect compromise between comfort and warmth, particularly I was going from one cold city to another with only a 70 minute stopover in a warm one. Well, as most of the US & Canada found out, pretty much the entire Upper Midwest was shut down and that 70 minutes stretched out to 7 hours...7 hours in wool in 70 degrees. 

It's jackets from here on in.

Fortunately it was not as grueling as Sugarbaker sisters flying to Japan.

Jukebox Video of the Year: Special Mention

The first ever Jukebox of the Year Special Mention must go to Japanese electropop princess Aira Mitsuki's GALAXY BOY.

Apart from being very catchy (and well produced), it does have a high degree of unintentional comedy due to Aira's slight lisp. 

Listen to the first 45 seconds and see how many scatological references you pick up.*

* I'll take a wild guess and assume that this is just due to mispronunciation.

GALAXY BOY first appeared during the The Grand Super Special 1000th Post Celebration back in September.

Quick Rave: KJ Denhert

We tend to be mostly about foreign music at this corner of the internet: Korean House, Italian electro-clash, German rap, whatever shape Eurovision takes in a given year. So let's switch gears for a moment and talk about *GASP* American music and artists.

KJ Denhert describes her music as Urban Folk & Jazz, which is a fusion I have never heard before, and apparently is not one I've really come across in other artists. She sounds somewhat like a cross between Sade (a Sade that allows herself to be happy) and Swing Out Sister with lyrical oomph. 

Her latest release is a live recording from the Umbria Jazz festival, where she opened for Alicia Keys. (Controversal opinion: I personally find Denhert more accessible than Keys, not to knock Ms. Alicia, but lyrically I get Denhert's easier.) One of the strongest tracks on it is actually the opener (intro aside), I Got Time which becomes rather poignant after a rousing start. Fortunately, the album keeps the momentum going. Hearing her sing He's Not Coming Home live has a certain punch to it for me. (The song itself has strong meanings to me recently with the whole move to Australia.) 

You can buy Dal Vivo a Umbria Jazz and Lucky 7 (her latest studio album) here. (She runs her own label, so I'll do my bit to steer traffc her way.)

It's Off!

Richard Branson can rest well, BA-QF is now not happening according to the Sydney Morning Herald.

The fiance thinks that perhaps that even in its tarnished state, Flying Roo didn't want to marry beneath themselves.

December 2008 Video Log: Part 1

The sudden flurry of snow makes me delighted (and gramatically challenged for a bit) ...



And then turns me into Veruca Salt with testosterone

The Flying Roo is a Slag

First they want to take the BA relationship to the next level, now they supposedly want to get just as close to Malaysia Airlines.

The funny twist here is that Malaysia Airlines is looking like Julia Roberts in My Best Friend's Wedding because Qantas isn't saying anything.

Airlines are truly soap operas.

BAQF: Bah Humbug

So says The Australian:

JP Morgan analyst Matt Crowe said consolidation would tend to transfer pricing power from consumers to airlines.

Consumers have probably benefited from having incredibly competitive aviation markets putting in more capacity at lower prices than you would optimally do, and consolidation is a way of reversing that trend, Mr Crowe said.

So say I.

Jukebox Videos of the Year: The Contenders

I truly can't believe it's December, it's like 2008 just started, although this has been a rather rough year for me, so I'm all for 2009.

Nonetheless, as befits these year-end retrospectives, here are the eight nominees (via the jury of one) for Jukebox Videos* of the Year:

* Yes, there will be two winners. This corner of the internet likes even numbers.

1. Ingrid Peters - Africa
2. capsule - JUMPER
3. Jukebox is a Funk Stew
4. The Danish Eurovision retrospective
5. German Rap Is A Different Animal
6. DOUBLE & Namie Amuro - BLACK DIAMOND
7. SMAP Us Upside The Head
8. Loving Jason Walker

Kosuke Atari & Alan Hržica will be given the Punctured Eardrum Award for bringing the EEEEEE! out.

The two winners will be announced later this week. Feel free to edge the jury one way or the other in the comments.

Contrary to the rumours circulating out there, Mike Woods will NOT be presenting.

Sunday Jukebox is a Funk Stew

Korea's Oriental Funk Stew that is, which has the honour of being the last (official)* jukebox of the year. As the name promises, funky house is always welcome at this corner of the internet.

* The Jukebox Videos of the year nominations will be announced by the jury of one later today. Any subsequent jukeboxes are valid for 2009...so says the jury of this one.

Here's his (it's pretty much a (very strikingly handsome) one-man team with guest vocalists) latest: Deep Inside of Love



And from earlier this year: Sweet Melody

Friday Jukebox Wants Sakis Rouvas

Remember him? He shook his thing in 2004, and was the sane part of the controlled anarchy that was Eurovision 2006.

Well, apparently when not chalking up Hugh Jackman type rumours, he's been working on a new album and got the nod to represent Greece next year in Moscow.

I have to say that his stage presence--which wasn't that bad in the first place--is even better, as evidenced by this stage attacking performance earlier this year.

The Flying Roo Takes Another Hit

...and it's a well-deserved one.

Qantas & BA are fined for price-fixing cargo.

I hope they start delving into passenger fares, because fares from the US (particularly East of the Mississippi) to Australia on Qantas are absolutely extortionate, to the point that it is nearly cheaper to fly via Europe than direct.

Sydney Can't Move

This is not exactly the sort of news I want to read 6 months before I move to Sydney.

Apparently, Sydney ranks behind Mumbai & Mexico City in terms of public transport.

Not being a fan of driving--and being very pro-mass transit in general--I will say that at least based on my own observations, no metropolitan area comes truly close to New York in terms of having a really effective transit system.*

* That doesn't excuse the MTA, nor the fact that the system itself needs serious upgrading.

Yep, the Peacock's Gone Crazy

According to Nielsen, Leno is barely beating Nightline when it comes to viewers, especially the 25-54 demo.

This is the "new" Koppel-less Nightline mind you.

It's Like He Refuses To Disappear

Either brain power is in short supply at the peacock or they have a CO2 leak, because prolonging Jay Leno's stay on our screens makes no sense.

Some may argue that this might have to do with costs, but if they were really more concerned with costs than with ownership, they'd go get some international programming (c.f CBS and Flashpoint).

Tuesday Jukebox brings totty and divas

I'm currently in a medium writing period (hence the brief posts recently), but I thought it would be interesting to share some of the background music I've been using...

Wait, that's a lie--well, a partial one. I am indeed in a writing period, but quite frankly, Alan (or Alen) Hrzica's back catalogue isn't big enough (npi) to be a major component. He is, however, a nice pleasing sight during breaks, plus he tends to do uptempo songs, which is always a plus.

Alas, he's only recorded one album (which I can't find for love or money).

Sit back, bop your head, and enjoy:





Ok, Neka Te Odvede may be a ballad, but Alan gets the Kosuke Atari exemption.



We now return to sultry disco Alan, the way it should always be, dammit.



Finally: at least for Alan (sigh), here is Violine, which seems to combine the disco and ballad sides...somewhat



Now the title does say totty and divas, and ever since I stumbled across this clip some time ago, I have been trying to figure out the right post for it. I reckon this one is it. (I bow down to whoever assembled this!) I figure this is a perfect counterpoint with the Hrzica back catalogue.

Happy Holidays, Now Here's Your Pink Slip

WNBC tapes its Christmas sing-along, and then proceeds to cut staff.

Apparently tact and decorum is not part of efficiency.

Thursday Jukebox Dreams of Legends

Disclaimer: I really need to really brush up on my Japanese (a Japanese name doesn't guarantee linguistic ability...much to my chagrin).

Why do I mention that? Well, I suspect there are more things going on lyrically in this song (Dream Legend/Yume Densetsu) by Stardust Revue. Understand this song is a bit of a classic, but there is something slightly poignant and a bit tragic about a somewhat past-it prog-rock band with a somewhat past-it lead who is doing some serious vocal damage singing a song about a legendary dream (or is it a dream legend, which boggles the mind even further?).

Camp Alert for this Sunday

HBO starts rolling out its Saddam Hussein miniseries this Sunday, in the similar multipart format as John Adams.

Whereas John Adams was very dry and almost mind-numbingly mundane at times, House of Saddam is pretty much Harold Robbins meets Jackie Collins in Iraq.

Stephen Has A Strop: They're Being Mean To Me!

In a very "up is down" kind of world, this would make sense, but for some bizarre reason the Governor General (Canada) has agreed to Stephen Harper's decision to suspend parliament until January.

I like to think that Michelle is a very savvied person, but I am honestly perplexed at this decision, although I certainly believe that it is possible she knows something more than the public in regards to this.

Something is Foul in the Kingdom of Burgers

I'm not one of those creeped out by the plastic permagrinned Burger King.

I just find it daft.

I'm not disturbed by the Simon & Garfunkel knockoffs singing the praises of a [Mu]shroom & Swiss burger.

I just find it daft.

And now with its latest crop of ads, the marketing department at Burger King may have crossed the line, according to some.

I have seen one of these ads only one time, and none since. My impression of it was that was--unsurprisingly--daft.

I also have to agree with the critics, it is rather insensitive.

That said, the devil's advocate in me would point out that "dumb humour" is Burger King's current shtick. McDonald's is family friendly, Wendy's appeals to your thrifty side, and White Castle (because it already has the image of being so cheap, that it's low quality) appeals to your primal instinct.

Nonetheless, you have to wonder at what point ad execs will realise that annoyance marketing will come back and bite them on their overpaid, C student butts.

Two things worth noting:

1. Burger King's Australian operation, Hungry Jack's appears not to have taken on this new theme of ads.
   
2. My own informal survey of fast food menus shows that Burger King's menu on the whole is the most calorie laden of the lot. (I love this new law in New York City that mandates that calories be displayed prominently.)
   

This Could Be Big

British Airways is in merger talks with Qantas.

Now, Australia has similar rules to US in regards to foreign ownership, which is that Australian companies or shareholders must own the majority of shares, so just how much of a merger the two can do is rather interesting.

Plus the fact that BA is about to merge with Iberia.

'Twill be interesting to see if this goes further. Admittedly, Qantas needs some help, but is going back to the motherland the answer?

Happy Days (Might) Be Here Again

Taking the expression that united we rise and divided we fell, the Liberals, the NDP, and the Bloc are hoping to band together in a ruling coalition--if the Tories are booted out in a no-confidence vote on the 8th.

You can get the nitty-gritty (pun partly intended) from the CBC, but the real thing that makes me happy (inasmuch as a NDP supporter who can't vote and isn't a Canadian citizen can be) is that the NDP will get 25% of cabinet posts.

Extra bonus: endless potential for comedy as Not Celene Dion will be PM.

Take That, Britney

Or is it Britney Take That?

Apparently, Britney Spears & Take That have released albums with the same title (give or take an article) on the same day. 

Even with relatively close scores by the BBC's Mark Savage, I don't think the new MOR Take That and the new electropop Britney are going to have that much crossover.

Rack Off*, Twot**

The second I saw this daft fool, I figured that the schmaltz brigade would try to inflict him on an unsuspecting public.

I also doubted his altrustic motives. Quite frankly, he was in it for the money, as this article in The Sydney Morning Herald illustrates.

* "Rack off" apparently has more heft than "fuck off" in Australia.

** Another Australian slang word, substitute the "o" for an "a" for the UK version.  

Pause & Reflect

Today is World AIDS Day.

While the world works on a cure, I find stories like Noo's rather inspiring.

If you live in the New York, Albany, or DC area, take some time out today to donate and/or purchase something at Housing Works. 

The Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade 2008 Post-Mortem

I'd be lying if I didn't say this is going to be a special post-mortem. It will be (probably to the joy of the fuzzy sweater brigade who seem to stumble across these Thanksgiving Day posts) the last one I write before moving to Australia. The fiance swears that it airs down there--although I have my doubts, since why would anyone in Australia want to watch some daft ode of to American consumerism?

Hold on.  I think I answered my own question.

Now supposedly, the thing should be airing (it's after 8 CST), but apparently WTMJ is still holding onto Today, for whatever reason. I'm guessing that Hoda Kotb has got the chance to be on air--sans Kathie Lee--before 10 EST and she is holding the network programming coordinator hostage to make sure everybody in Central sees her.

Or just WTMJ is weird. They do believe in bifurcating Today with a silly Live knockoff. 

Either way, the damn thing finally gets started at 9 am.

Deep-voiced announcer is rather unenthused until he gets to the fact it's the 86th edition. Matt & Meredith make an entrance through a bunch of cheerleaders. Matt thinks that stating that it is 37F would elicit sympathy. It's 25F here, Matty, so shut it.

They cut to Al, who is Uptown. Al appears via the (very talented) East New York Soul Tigers Drum Line. I must say that the Soul Tigers are the most genuinely lively thing so far, but then again, it is only 4 minutes in.

Deep-voiced announcer (DVA, haha) spits out celebrity names with mild enthusiasm. I don't know how, because this is one of the most Z-list groups of celebrities I've either heard. I also thought Andy Williams was dead, but apparently not. Just his career, for those of us who are indifferent to Branson.

M&M get a second to intro the cheerleaders before their music comes on, and their music must've been selected by someone who had severe ADD. The routine, not so much. The smiles are frightening, to be honest. 

Al talks to Selma Blair, as part of the first of many WATCH NBC plugs. Selma does a good job of maintaining her dignity while plugging Kath & Kim.

M&M intro In The Heights.

Yeah, I'm glad you got the Tony, but I'm still not running to go see it. That being said, the cast must be wearing stockings if it's 37F.  That's brave. 

This number goes on a little too long, and the camera shots did it few favours. 

Oh well.

Next up, Hasselhoff mk. II plugs his pointless revival of Knight Rider. Hasselhoff mk. II is dumb. Hasselhoff mk. II must've put out.

M&M intro White Christmas and look for the white powder underneath the desk.

White Christmas looks and sounds the calibre of a third-tier suburban community theatre. But since Joe Bob & Minnie have gushy memories of the movie and they don't want anything too new to tax their brains, it'll do well.

I'll need some Pepto if all the damn shows are going to be this unnecessarily OTT.

DVA says Harry Connick Jr. will being the helicopter tour this year. Now, if memory serves me correctly, we have gone from Martin Short (not bad), to Bob Saget (surprisingly good), and now Harry Connick Jr. I hold out little hope, but maybe he's had a few and realises that the helicopter tour is meant to be sarcastic. 

Al talks to an unrecognisable Michael Flatley. Facelift Flatley promos some NBC knockoff of So You Think You Can Dance.

M&M cut him off to intro South Pacific. Now, this revival is apparently selling out like nobody's business, but of all the songs to perform they choose "There Ain't Nobody Like A Dame?" 

It's the best so far, but that's like being the 1st circle of Hell.

Finally they show Harry Connick Jr.'s helicopter tour of the parade route. Unfortunately, he's sober. He says that it's exciting, but really I think he took some Sominex. 

M&M plug his album. The man couldn't be bothered to plug his own damn album.

Al allows two Office cast members to plug their show. They're eager, but man, how sad is it that NBC couldn't convince Steve Carrell to go and plug his own show. 

NBC is the Titanic and reality is an iceberg.

Al is still at CPW who corrals one of the random Heroes "stars," who barely mentions the show. Yep, that show has got some longevity.  

M&M take ages to intro the atrocity that is The Little Mermaid (the musical). 

Sadly, i've seen it, although in my defence, I didn't pay.

And yes, the show is that bad for anyone over the age of 5, or at least that annoying.

Ad commentary: Buying mayonnaise is not making a commitment to "real" food. I just think those ad execs should note that.

M&M's dealer is taking his/her own sweet time, so they are running low on energy as they intro the Rockettes.

Anyway, if you've seen one Rockette number, you've seen them all. So I'm going to take this moment to say--yet again--that I miss Katie Couric and her sarcasm. You get the sense that Matt wants to go there, but Meredith just wants to get through the damn show. 

The Rockettes are doing their kicks inside a circle and it's still rather blah. Yes, I know it takes talent and skill and all that nonsense, but I'm just saying that it doesn't film well. Blame the director and choreographer.

Still they get to introduce the parade to Herald Square (thank god I'm not home with all that racket). 

M&M are still lagging for want of charlie.

And it's that damn Tom Turkey float--I'll miss your ugliness Tom Turkey.

Some band from Sioux Falls in quasi-military uniforms plays "Don't Rain On My Parade."

It's a relatively decent job, but the uniforms look reminescent of the fascist Italy.

Matt swears this is the first Smurf balloon. I seriously doubt that. Apparently Sony will have a Smurf movie in 2010. Good god, how sad is that.

James Taylor (PEPTO!) sings some slow-as-molasses version of "America The Beautiful," with no conviction whatsoever. 

Snoopy Balloon and I am continually surprised that M&M can natter on about one damn balloon.

Every year they find more inanity to talk about it. Their banter writer must have OCD.

Disney gets in a float to plug their new film Bolt, complete with Miley Cyrus singing on it. Quite frankly, even though she's lipsyncing, she certainly is selling the living daylights out of it. You'd think NBC was ABC the way that they are letting Disney plug its products with wild abandon.

DVA mentions that Citi is one of the sponsors. Well, that was money well spent.

They come back from ads with the Polynesian Dance Ensemble of Hawaii. Perhaps this section of the parade will be better than much of what has proceeded it. 

Some Rihanna knockoff called Shontelle lip-syncs some song called "T-shirt." Wow, this is some blatant ripping off. I'm almost embarassed for her, but not as much as I pity her.

Some band from California plays something by Leonard Bernstein and they're rather talented. Well, certainly more than Shontelle. At least they aren't lip-syncing, and honestly, that's all you can hope for.

Have I crossed over into the Twilight Zone? Gwen Stefani's sodding Harajuku Girls have got their own float? They fortunately don't sing, but they play an instrumental of Hollaback Girl, which means, well, let me direct you to the hilarious explanation by OC Weekly. Hollaback Girl, by the way, is not at all family friendly in terms of lyrics. (Just thought I should point that out to any fuzzy sweater wearers reading this.)

Back from ads, and we have a jump rope team from Ohio. This is impressive. 

Meredith's charlie has kicked in enough to the point to make a joke about the Energizer bunny.

Matt's not so much, so he drawls his way through the intro to the Sesame Street float. And it is agreed here in Wisconsin that some of those original cast members need to retire.

M&M intro some band from Fayetteville (AK). Again, the band is competent, but what sadist chose the uniforms and outfits. You're a marching band not a paramilitary outfit. 

Meredith (*snort*) intros some daft girl band call Clique Girlz (sic). They are on a float sponsored by My Princess Academy. Right there on one float is everything that is wrong with America: poor grammar, inflated self-esteem (leading to impossible and improbable expectations), and obsessive consumerism in order to fill in the emotional void left by poor parenting.

Matt (*big snort* since he has to catch up to Meredith) gets a burst of energy as he intros the Big Apple Circus and Mr. Peanut. I'll avoid a Matt Lauer & nuts joke.

The History Channel float has the cast of Hair on it. How appropriate since both are stuck in time warps. The cast performs ably, but honestly, did we need a revival of Hair? Especially since it really is to just line the pockets of the producers.

Mounted police get booed. Ouch!

Matt gives such a tongue bath to Ronald McDonald and his corporate owners that Willard Scott blushes.

Ad commentary: I paid attention to Progressive ads much more when they just gave facts?

Ad commentary part II: Oddly enough, I think a dating show where mates are vetted by a mother is great.

And they are back and am pleasantly pleased to see the Alvin Ailey Dance Troupe perform "Wade in the Water." M&M even manage to point out the significance behind the song.

And they are cut off for another socially significant event: a Keith Haring (RIP) balloon. 

And that is cut off by M&M pointing out that Al has joined them. (Yay! I get to say MAM now.)

Keith Haring's balloon apparently nearly took out MAM. Go Haring's ghost!

Hess float: Some teen band from the Guyland lip syncs some pop/rock song, while MAM still recover from Keith Haring's balloon trying to take them out. (I'm still giggling.)

MAM are so shell-shocked they nearly forget to intro the Guyland marching band playing.

MAM intro the M&M float which has Idina Menzel singing. I do believe she is lip-syncing. Tsk. Decent MOR song, although I think we heard the only interesting part of it.

MAM talk quite eagerly (*snort*) about Pikachu, and I'm surprised that Pokemon is still popular. The charlie is clearly in abundance now.

MAM manage to plug NBC's latest acquisition, The Weather Channel in a record 5 seconds. Why so quick? Well, David It's-too-early-for-me-to-try-to-spell-his-last-name-correctly is performing. He's lip-syncing and looks like a dog caught in the headlights. He is Andy Gibb for the 21st Century. 

Wow, another Disney plug, this time for Toy Story (third movie coming in 2010!). 

MAM are still nervous about the balloons attacking them. Meanwhile, Rick Astley crashes the float of some Cartoon Network show. Oh, I do like the way that this parade is turning out now. He's lipsyncing, but I don't care, it's Rick Astley! That was truly funny and clearly Astley is in on the joke as well. 

Ad commentary: Lipitor's message is certain to fall on deaf ears on Thanksgiving,

Now the parade has truly improved: balloon attacks and Rick Astley!

MAM introduces some dance troupe performing a "latin" dance number, with music more suited to the White Party than a MOR parade on television. The number is unbelievably frenetic and over before it started. Those 635 kids got ripped off.

Macy's own gold stars get barely a mention considering its their 150th anniversary. 

Good Housekeeping has a flipping float? On it, some teenage girl sings (and yes, I believe she really is singing) "Because You Love Me." She is technically good, but there is a disconnect between her and the lyrics. Note to any teenage singers: sing songs that you truly connect with.

Putting the name "Awesome" in your band's name is just tempting fate. Well, they're game, I'll give them that. Not too bad.

Spongebob Squarepants Balloon comes gliding down Broadway and there is now a slight hint of panic in their voices every time MAM talk about a balloon. (Ha!)

Trace Adkins (apparently he's big in country music) sings (the jury's out on whether he's lipsyncing) on the Jimmy Dean float. It wasn't the most enthusiastic performance, to be honest.

Ad commentary: From my own personal experience, Sprint's 3G network doesn't work all that well around Herald Square. I'm just pointing this out, Mr. Hesse.

And we're back with a float sponsored by the Oneida Nation. Perhaps out of respect, MAM keep silent.

Back to frivolity as MAM plug an upcoming Muppet special on NBC. (Really? I thought ABC had the Muppets sewn up, pun intended.)

Some nondescript boyband called Varsity Fanclub lip sync on the USPS float, and it's hilarious how every single boyband has the exact same moves. By the way, I thought the era of the classic (i.e. no instruments) boyband was over.

MAM introduce another marching band, this time from Texas. They of course play "Deep in the heart of Texas." They also look like a paramilitary force.

Now here comes a hilarious marching band, a bunch of men in business suits and briefcases. Thank god for absurdity.

Sadly, it's over too quickly as Ashanti (I think she's singing) is on the Daily News float and performing some atrocious overwrought ballad.

That embarrassment is over quickly for a plug for the latest direct-to-DVD knockoff of a bad 90s movie.  

Speaking of bland holdovers from the 90s, Darius Rucker of Hootie & The Blowfish sings on the Gibson guitar float. He is technically good, but not all that moving. I'm old enough to remember when Hootie & the Blowfish was synonymous with boredom.

Back from ads, the Special Needs Color Guard perform to the tune of the Theme from the Greatest American Hero. That's just too OTT, not the performance, just the music choice.

Yet another random tween singer lip-syncs (and the recording isn't that much better) on the Build-A Bear-or-I'll-Scream float. What I wrote about the My Princess Academy float applies here.

Shrek float, which gives MAM the chance to hype $hrek: The Mu$ical. 

MAM intro the JMU marching band. So far, the best one so far, although I would add that we didn't get a chance to see much of the Soul Tigers.

Ad commentary: The Brewers have quite a funny ad running here with the infamous running Sausages caroling. I remember when Milwaukee didn't even like to admit that they had a baseball team.

MAM get cut off introducing some North Carolinian high school band. Why? I don't know. They play "Boogie Wonderland" as a comedy number and I must say that it was slightly better than JMU.

Apparently the Care Bears are back, and befitting their sugary sweet antiseptic image, Kristen Chenowith is LIPSYNCING a Christmas song on it. She passed up a good opportunity to show up Idina Menzel.

Ad commentary: Macy's corporate actions run contrary to message of Santa Claus. 

MAM bring us the "Winter Wonderland" float, with Kermit the Frog and "Camp" Broadway.

The song is classic syrupy sweet pap, and sadly "Camp" Broadway is only "camp" Broadway, this year. Kermit, however, is still "Camp." Weak.

Matt makes a "road/toad" joke, and it falls flat. The charlie has run out and MAM are scatter-brained. Appropriately, that serves as their introduction for Andy Williams, who is also lipsyncing. I'll cut Andy some slack since he looks out of it, the poor thing. The kids performing behind him however are camping it up big time.

The final band is "Macy's Great American Marching Band." They, like Macy's itself, are very flashy and robotic. 

Meredith coos that "Santa Claus is coming to town." I think they have switched to GHB and vodka, judging by the amount of slurring going on with MAM. 

Probably the most OTT Santa Claus float ever. 

Al tries to stress the importance of this parade in lieu of the current economic dire straits. He also mentions that he'd like to do it over again. They do need a bit of a do-over, to be honest. Matt looks bored. Meredith looks  like Annette Bening in American Beauty. Al just looks dazed.

Well, it wasn't the best edition-but it was adequate, even if the only highlights were a balloon attacking MAM and Rick Astley.

Yes, I Watched It...And Yes, I Liked It

And this is a good parody, but name the show that is the subject of that parody...I'm not that low budget.

La Perry Becomes Less Scummy

Well, La Perry realised he was wrong (or at least acted like he was in the wrong) and has done right by the WGA.

This bit illustrates quite a lot about La Perry's character:

During the dispute, a lawyer for Perry tried to claim that the writers' firings had nothing to do with contract negotiations but were related solely to "the quality of their work". But the firings came just asHouse Of Payne was being syndicated which is when the big money starts to roll in, and just when the writers were working on Perry's new comedy premiering in January on TBS. Perry's lawyer admitted that one sticking point with the WGA had been residuals from repeats shown on broadcast TV stations. Those residuals are vital to the financial security of showbiz writers even though a pittance to the producers. Perry also refused to agree to a WGA contract giving the writers health care benefits or pensions. Perry fired the writers after warning them some weeks ago that they should “be careful about pushing the WGA deal or you could be replaced,” according to one of the axed scribes.

And it took the NAACP for him to do the right thing?

Now, let's see if he manages to get through Madea Goes To Jail without any homophobia.

Thanksgiving Week Video Log

It may seem rather inane, but a stop to a local grocery store back in Wisconsin during Thanksgiving Week, (particularly when moving overseas next year) can be mildly poignant.

Does A Daft Marketing Ploy Annoy In The Woods?

Toilet paper company rolls out public loos, accompanied by a D-grade former boy band member.

Yes, they've got televisions and tuxedoed attendants, but I think it diminishes the brand (not that they had much further to go with shitting bears being their mascots).

Still, one has to ask (especially since this is the 3rd year of this nonsense):

Mikey & Rudy, what hath you wrought?

Sunday is for Eccentrics

Like the BBC, I'm not going to call this man crazy, but he certainly is on the border between eccentric and having a psychological disorder.

All that being said, I somewhat understand where he is coming from:

• The population density of Japan is such that perhaps the solitude of a foreign airport (even if that airport serves one of the largest cities in the world) is quite appealing.
  
• Airports allow you to experience a country--somewhat--with a degree of comfort and security.

Nonetheless, he's living on kindness and hasn't showered. So it can't be all that admirable.

Now it's the Actors' turn

SAG is going to strike--or rather they are highly encouraging their members to vote for one, according to the Associated Press.

AFTRA (the smaller similar union that also covers radio) settled with the studios/major producers.

The sticking points for SAG seem to be relatively similar to the ones brought up during the Writers' Strike: new media residuals (royalties).

I sympathise with them, but I think it will be a harder sell for SAG to win over public opinion.

It's All Going On In Mequon

Police shootings and now random acts of attempted vehicular homicide.

And she was aiming for her husband and daughter?

The Chickens Come Home To Roost (Part 51)

Today's Sydney Morning Herald has an article discussing the uproar amongst several Australians who have donated to the fascist, xenophobic, and just plain disturbing British National Party (think the KKK as a political party).

The reactions are rather absurd and completely devoid of self-awareness in my opinion, preferring to mask their bigotry under wanting to reduce immigration. (Well, perhaps not that 24 year old swim coach--who has never even been to the UK).

I have a message for that swim coach: I was in Brixton and Soho when David Copeland bombed them, he may have claimed to act alone, but the BNP helped groom him into the monster he was.

The Chickens Are Coming Home To Roost (Part 50)

For starters, the idea of a Maserati dealership in any part of the state of Wisconsin (except for Kenosha) is funny (as in bizarre) enough, especially strictly middle class Glendale.*

* As I have said before, Milwaukee television doesn't paint a picture of an economically prosperous area. Even with United's magazine claiming otherwise this month. (Note: PDF file)

That the aforementioned dealership is closing after a few months in operation is a true triumph of common sense over needless excess.

Wednesday Jukebox Saves Earth

Or rather, Skoop on Somebody (yes, that's their name, and I have no idea as to what "Skooping" is) says they'll save the Earth.




A rather happy optimistic tune to brighten up any Wednesday doldrums.

That New Set

The Daily News has a [puff piece] article about WNBC's new set.

Now, Richard Huff--in general--tells it straight, so he does offer a bit of skepticism, especially in relation to the fact that they are spinning it as a "content center."

Personally, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that set is a major step down. There's no character to it, and there's nothing terribly distinctive or local about it. It just looks like the reception desk of a small (but pretentious) company.




What I find particularly ironic is that this is a key part of WNBC's addition of a 24 hour local news channel.* Well, if that's the case, then where is the actual city? It may seem like a minor issue, but showing at least some of the New York skyline (especially when your studios are in Rockefeller Center!) would underline this new local "commitment."

* Also worth noting is that New York 1 has no local backdrop, but I cut them some slack since they don't have the same amount of resources (even as a part of Time Warner) at their disposal as WNBC.

Photography Break

In the midst of writing, I took this one photo during a break.

*Sigh*

I'll miss this next year.

Harsh Medicine

The new head of the Screen Producers Association of Australia says that Australian film makers don't deserve their A$100 million/yr subsidy, because their films aren't good...in the eyes of the public.

Ouch.

That being said, I don't think the "ram it down our collective throats" approach of US filmmakers is that much better.

The October/November Video Log

Video Log...interrupted

Oh well, the content hopefully is good.

Honestly, these past few weeks have been full of so much emotion, that it's probably a good thing that the Helio gave out (Apologies for my shaky hand.) before I got a little bit too long-winded.

Enjoy!

Aeroflot Out-Aerofloted

The Russian government is going on a buying spree of airlines, particularly those in Siberia and the Russian Far East.

The behemoth is to be given the terribly original name of "Russian Airlines."

Aeroflot execs are understandably pissed.

Personally, I'm skeptical, but not entirely opposed.

Indeed, I agree with consolidation of the airline industry, but more along the lines of creating several smaller carriers with a regional focus rather than one big carrier.

But Russia is not the US and vice versa, and the population is not as high, so perhaps this might work.

Then again, a Putin crony is a proponent of this, and who knows if the broken clock is right on this one?

Um....This Is Rather Squicky

I know that the apple often doesn't fall far from the tree, but this Journal Sentinel article about a a woman trying out to be a Playboy Bunny (which makes her mother proud) is kind of....odd.

Perhaps it's made a bit odd that the wannabe Bunny was in the year below me in school.

Innocence is dead.

A Moment of Sanity

I have little to say about all the Proposition 8 debacle beyond what I said before.

(It makes one wonder how a sampling of 200+ voters can suddenly speak for all.)

Fortunately,  fivethirtyeight has a sane analysis of the vote.

Emirates Goes Down

I cannot say that I weep for Dubai's home airline.

In fact, a good dose of schadenfreunde is tasting quite well.

Seriously though, when they say there's a global airline economic crisis...believe it.

I Guess Mequon Is Changing

Shootout in Mequon of all places?

Perhaps this is just the writer side of me showing, but I find this comment interesting:

"This isn't the type of thing that happens in Mequon frequently..."

Frequently? Well, it's true...you can't go home again.

And I Ask What's Wrong With This

If he said he was going to do it, why are you surprised that he's following through?

Believe you me, most of the people complaining will actually see a tax cut. 

That's right, you aren't as rich as you think you are.

Friday Jukebox Is Another Attempt To Musicalise The Zeitgeist

...Or to be honest, I finally found a performance clip of Ingrid Peters singing Afrika, and tried to shoehorn it into current events.

Although, to be honest, the song does come across as a prime example of what Edward Said was taking about and applying it to Africa...a continent with a plethora of countries and cultures.

Just today, while doing some errands, a white man came up to me and said--with no malice whatsoever on his face--that I must be happy with the election, and noted that he voted for Obama.

I pointed out to him that as Americans, all of us should be happy.

How I love Ozaukee County Naivete.

Anyway, sing Ingrid.

Wednesday Jukebox Tries To Explain the Zeitgeist again

There's a lot of mixed emotions I'm going through today: shock, happiness, and after the Prop 8 results--anger. 

I know that it's likely to be overturned (the California Supreme Court in their ruling stated clearly that equal treatment and rights of all Californians is fundamental, if memory serves me), but nonetheless, one always hopes that you can finally live in a world where people choose wisely when given the option to vote on equal rights and protections.

At home: sadly evil Ms. Darling pipped out a win over Sheldon Wasserman (courtesy of the Mequon returns which went in her favour), although just barely; and Jimmy Boy won by 80%.  I can only hope that this term he has a metaphorical "Come to Jesus" moment and realises the error of his ways.

So it's a lot to think about.

I can't believe that I am alive--and not even close to collecting my pension--at a time when the US has elected a black president...and by such a resounding margin. 

Therefore, my jukebox take on it is the partly incomprehensible, jarring, but still jubliant Jumper by Capsule.

A Tale from the Ozaukee County Obama Headquarters

After probably the longest lines I've ever seen at my polling place (a near half hour wait--at 10am), I finally voted.

Personally, I will take these long lines as a positive sign.

On the way there, my mother shared an interesting story about the local (as in county) Obama Headquarters. Apparently, people going there to visit/get information/volunteer start out by entering in very slowly almost like they don't want to be seen entering in there. (Much like going to one's first gay bar.) Clearly they must have started relaxing their nerves since--and I know I have said this before, but I still can't believe it--the amount of Obama signs here is unbelievably high. 

Hilariously, the centre of McCain/Palin signage is in front of a barren lot and next to an abandoned restaurant.

A Reminder of our absurd political system

The Journal Sentinel is just a fountain of information today, with an article on electors. (My god, some ex-Real Worlder could be a Republican elector?)

While it is important that we all vote, it is also important to remember just how the US electoral system works. 

In other words, for all our bluster about bringing democracy to the world, our own form of it is rather...um...archaic given the demographic changes since 1787.

My favourite part of the article is this passage (emphasis my own):

"Reformers say it's time to do away with an outdated system set up by the Founding Fathers to protect elections from a mass of uneducated voters. John Koza, one of the inventors of the scratch-off lottery ticket, is one of them."

It took more than one person to come up with the scratch-off lottery ticket?

Meanwhile in Wauwatosa...

Today's Journal Sentinel features an article on a couple who apparently still AT THIS POINT undecided.

Several things:

1. If you're "informed" then you really ought to have made up your mind now. (Perky wife pretty much admits that her obsession over abortion is the only reason she stays undecided.)
2. Anyone that has that many conservative beliefs but calls themselves "independent" has clearly been asleep during their US History classes.

 

This Is Not The North Shore I Remember...

...Or is it?

I am back in Wisconsin for election week. 

While I would be surprised enough to see one Obama/Biden sign, I am positively shocked that they outnumber McCain/Palin signs by at least 4 to 1. 

And this is over 4 suburbs. The only one bucking the trend is Bayside, where the McCain/Palin signs scream more desperation than support.

I am really and truly shocked...in a pleasant way.

We even have one very nasty State Senate race in my district.

Dare I even dream that Sensenbrenner might get unseated as well? Well, I've only seen one sign supporting Jimmy Boy.

Whither Belgium...Whiter Ourselves

The BBC takes a look at whether the Belgian state will survive, and how it's at risk even if neither side actively seeks it.

While I've often said that Belgian devolution is a bit of a warning to what might happen to the United States, one thing that has yet to truly manifest in the US is ethnic political parties and exclusive ethnocultural pop culture. We do have--to some extent--ethnocentric pop culture (basic cable is full of examples of this), that pop culture is only part of the cultural diet of an average American. (In other words, LOGO and BET viewers feel completely comfortable watching ABC, NBC, etc.)

Still, one has to wonder what exactly binds us all together, beyond mere geography.

From the "Snow Is Cold" File

Now, I hate to rag on the Journal Sentinel for doing a series on binge drinking--because it is a severe problem in Wisconsin--but I cannot believe that they thought feigning surprise at the fact that the problem is indeed that bad in Wisconsin was the right way to present it.

Our sodding baseball team is named the Brewers!

They play at Miller Park.

There was a sitcom set in Milwaukee about two women working at a brewery.

People (instate and out) know that binge drinking is bad in Wisconsin, but the real shocker is that so little is done to curb it.

Could We Please Reverse This Trend

...of popsters from the Soviet Union joining up with hip-hop producers. First we had Dima Bilan screech his way to a Eurovision win with a song produced by Timbaland. Now, Missy Elliot has joined forces with Ruslana on the latter's new album.




It's not a total miss, but it's not a bullseye either.

Thursday Jukebox Is A Literalist

This hilarious take of Take On Me, illustrates my major irritation with writing screenplays*



* You do have to write everything that happens on screen.

Thank You, Joe

I opted not to watch the debate last night, so I wasn't privy to all the "Joe the plumber" nonsense.

So I had to play catch up today.

My assessment was that Joe was one of those "I got mine" types.

You know, the ones who basically got us all into this fine economic mess we are in.

Well, the chickens are coming home to roost, "Joe."

Wednesday Jukebox is so Sergey

As in Lazarev. As in he-who-should've-won-the-Russian-selection-this-year.

Oh well, it looks like he's carved out not too shabby pop career for himself. (God knows what would happen if Diddy got his hands on him...Donnie who?)

Sergey got his start out in the boyband Smash!! (a name which is now being recycled--without exclamation points--in Korea).

Smash!! wasn't too bad, but the only song I really cared for was Freeway. Here's a rather hilarious (and lip-synced) performance from 2003, followed by the original video.







Then he pretty much went solo. He got a UK release for his cover of Shattered Dreams. (I feel a degree of relief in knowing that I was not much older than Sergey when the original came out.)





Quite wisely, Sergey's single Fake featured a remix entitled "gay club mix"




His most recent album TV show featured the single TV or Radio, which shows that Sergey is game for physical comedy.




From an anglophone lyrical standpoint, Sergey is a very handsome man.

Lest this jukebox end in sarcasm, once again, here's Flyer.




By the way, Sergey has a diary on his website. (It's mostly in Russian, naturally.) Apparently on July 7th, he met Whitney Houston. Whitney is looking...better, and I'm not going to even attempt to read into Sergey's reaction in the photo, except to say "a picture tells a thousand words."