The 590th Post Manifesto

I had an epiphany this weekend.

While many gay rights activists seem to say that we are focusing too much on marriage to the detriment of other areas, I tend to believe that we're not. I believe that marriage rights are only part of a goal that we need to implement in order to get full equal rights in this country.

(That's not the epiphany.)

I'm not in any way shape or form the first person to say this, but I want to put this out here on this little piece of the internet in the hopes that someone will read this and perhaps do this.

Today/tomorrow/this week/this coming month, write the following at the end of an email or a post you make on either a blog or a message board:

"Protect Marriage. Ban Divorce."

While on the surface that is a very marriage-rights thing to say, I offer it as a way of protesting against the absurd world we've been living in for the past 6 years.

- The NSA can follow your every movement without your knowledge or even with good reasoning.

- FEMA plays favourites with who they choose to save.

- The electoral process has been hijacked by cronies.

- A budget surplus has turned into a deficit.

- A tidal wave of goodwill has turned to animosity.

And many other nonsensical occurances that have come to fruition.

If you believe that we are living in times that make no sense, then I suggest that you write this at least once in a public way--especially as a non-sequitur--to show the world where you stand.

You don't have to explain it, just let it sink in.

Protect Marriage. Ban Divorce.

Friday Jukebox Has Something For The Weekend

Indeed, this is late, but it is still Harlem Week so enjoy.




By the way, is anyone else hearing "stick your dick right out and shout...?"

These Search Engines Are Interesting Things

Given the sad news today in respect to the Washington State Court's same sex marriage ruling, the mind started thinking towards the referendum in Wisconsin.

I tend to believe that if someone proclaims that they want to protect marriage, then they should ban divorce, plain and simple.

In fact, let's go all the way and start arranging mandatory heterosexual marriages for all children from the second they are born. They can take a personality test and find their ideal partner for life. (I can find that ideal woman out there who won't complain one bit when I refuse to have sex with her, instead preferring clandestine nude all-male trysts in my car.)

And since marriage is an institution made purely for reproductive purposes, I suggest that we now make it illegal for any sterile people to marry. (IVF for those of us who aren't naturally inclined that way.)

And now back to reality.

Now, the architect behind the referendum, Mark Gundrum, is a lawyer. Turns out that he's a lawyer in a firm that handles divorce cases.

It makes me wonder what his real motivations are behind pushing this.

Perhaps Gundrum is afraid that since gay & lesbian couples tend to stay together longer that he'll see a downturn in divorce cases and income.

Or perhaps he's afraid that he may get overworked since there wouldn't be a need for sham hetero marriages in Wisconsin (not that it's a threat at the moment since the law already defines marriage as solely heterosexual right).

But Marky, you really aren't fighting for your best interests. You should be fighting for it.

You're already spearheading the fight to make marriage cheaper, so why not expand it?

So clearly your interest here is money not morals. Correct me if I'm wrong here, Marky, but if you want marriage to be cheaper so that more people will get married, then shouldn't you want everybody to get married?

And if you believe so strongly in the institution of marriage, then how come you have basically made your living out of participating in its destruction?

I find it rather interesting, Marky, that your infamous quote "This is the time in particular when people need to re-enforce the institution of marriage, not reinvent it," is coming from a man who is actively trying to reinvent marriage.

I find it rather interesting that you refuse to even give out your positions on pressing issues facing the country to Vote Smart. Does your ability to be elected and stay in office rely upon people being ignorant of what you stand for? And if so, then why are you flying the homophobic flag so--dare I say it--proudly this time?

Marky, I think it's time you start realising that the 1950's are over and will not return. I think you need to start realising that just as integrated schools and interracial marriage did not cause the US to descend into anarchy, that maybe, just maybe, it won't mean that your marriage will suddenly be worthless.

Then again, if you feel that your marriage will disappear with same sex marriage legalised (and I hasten to point out again that it is not legal in Wisconsin), that probably means it was built on a shakier foundation than you'd like the rest of us to know about and that the lesbian couple who has been together for decades might be a bit more savvy in how to keep a relationship going than you do.

All in all, this just makes you look like a bully on the playground who got pissed since now he's the one with the wedgie.

Monday Jukebox Says The 80s Were Good To Me

It is a true shame that I was quite an oblivious child in early 1980's.

Example #1:

The Gap Band and Charlie Wilson's swagger--which to be honest he has every right to do (if you catch my drift)




(And let's not even get started on the video for "Party Train")

Example #2

The Opening animation for Daicon IV featuring ELO's "Twilght"




My first exposure to this piece of anime history was at AnimeCon '91, when I was 12. (I survived one more anime convention after that, then decided to keep my otaku-ness mostly to myself, for the sake of preserving sanity.) This short pretty much encapsulates everything that I love about film, television, theatre, and animation: whimsy. It's a shame that whimsy is now chained up in the attic being served table scraps every fortnight.

Example #3:

Philip Michael Thomas: R&B Singer




I just discovered this video and song. Let me tell you, I have no clue that PMT--hahaha--was hot as hell in his prime. The whole Miami Vice craze basically was lost to me, given that I was in elementary school at the time and my parents would've sooner checked themselves into an asylum than let me watch it. Yet watching this, I'm completely baffled as to how Don Johnson got the most press as that show's sex symbol.

Another thing: who knew PMT could sing like that?! He's no Charlie Wilson, but damn he comes close (and beats Don Johnson's acrid pop song by a country mile).

Only on this piece of the internet could you get The Gap Band, a bunny girl sci-fi fantasia, and Philip Michael Thomas all in one post.

Go Away Grace!

Was Eurovision 2006 the beginning of the huge media blitz of Maria Menounos (forever known to me as Grace after her horrid turn as presenter)?

It certainly seems so.

Yesterday, Grace was on MTV, since she was appearing in Jessica Simpson's new video (*cough* Madonna knockoff *cough*) for "Public Affair."

Then she was on some haircare advert.

Now Grace is co-hosting this morning on Today. The funny thing is that she still looks and sounds completely incompetent. Right now she's talking with a psychiatrist and somebody from US Magazine--oh, the combos you get on Today--and all I keep on hearing is her astute observation of "I think that's monster talk."

Splash-Stonewall-The View Post Mortem: Halloween in July

Apologies for the high interval between posts, but heat seriously does me in and sometimes it takes a high amount of energy to just be an automaton.

The night started off at Splash, where again the Cypriot was working downstairs and taking his sweet time in getting anything else beyond the first drink. There's a bartender upstairs who I'm quite keen on (and vice versa, believe me, because you've got to be blatant for me to pick it up), but ever since Splash has decided to have karaoke up there, there's no chance in hell of me getting my drink on with him.

That said, I have to admit the video selection was decidedly retro. It started off with a Carpenters tribute, followed up with Bette Midler (and Katie Couric!?) singing "Hey Big Spender," then Martha & The Vandellas doing "Heatwave," and when I left The Supremes were singing "Stop! In the name of love." Judging from that group, you wouldn't think that it was Black & Latin night just a few hours later.

Not that I would be a participant in it tonight, since I had to be down in The Village later on (after a quick Amaretto Sour down at The Stonewall, a quick drink because I had to go meet someone and because the weirdness of seeing peroxide blonde Valley Girls drinking next to me while Method Man played in the background, was just too much).

I eventually wound up--completely drenched--at The View.

Full Moons are known to bring out weird people. The same can be said of rain. I couldn't put my finger on it, but there was something definitely askew. I was no exception.

As you may or may not know, I'm a "former" anorexic and struggle often with body image issues. I mention this because I was wearing an article of clothing that I rarely wear outside the confines of my apartment: a loose tank top.

I really don't like showing skin in public. It goes back to the days when I was overweight and felt like The Hunchback of Notre Dame on a daily basis. I remember how I used to feel watching other guys doff off their shirts as if it was nothing and feeling a mix of jealousy and lust. Two thoughts would enter my head: 1) "Why can't I be so free and uninhibited?" 2) "Why do they think they're so hot?"

So tonight I challenged myself and to be honest, it was far from easy. I felt like I was wearing a Halloween costume on October 30th. My instinct was to run back to the apartment and immediately cover up before going out again. Yet, I still wanted to at least for one night chase away the demons that haunted me.

I came up with a modified mantra that most people use when encountering bears: "Don't be afraid, because there is no spotlight on you," a take on the popular "they're more scared of you, than you are of them."

And it's true.

It took a sudden downpour for me to realise something that most people pick up in elementary school.

The question is, can I remember it?

Greetings from GOP New York

I just finished Simon Winchester's Outposts, and found the chapter on Bermuda struck several parallels with modern day New York since Giuliani, feel free to weigh in:

"Bermuda then gave me the feeling that it was a sort of Disneyland, and that the shootings [of the Governor and ADC] were the local equivalent of a tourist having a heart-attack inside the plastic Matterhorn -- smiling young men with shrouds would clear everything up within seconds and hustle the cadaver away through a back door, and then the whirligigs would start up again and the crowds would re-form, like waters briefly parted, and the music would start, and the smiling young men would resume their cries of 'Have a nice day!' and all would seem well once more."

Tuesday Jukebox Says Stop Haunting Me

I like to think that I am not easily swayed by commercial jingles, but to this very day, I find NBC's mid-eighties slogan still running rampant in my head.




The fact that NBC is now doing horribly in the ratings is at least some solace.

In happier hauntings, I could swear that I remember Norway's 1979 entry from my childhood. (Even though I was still a few months old at the time.) Maybe it's just that Anita Skorgan looks uncannily like Karen Carpenter.

Just Because You're Pissed Off About Your Divorce...

...don't take it out on the rest of us, a great many who can't even marry.

If there's anything more indicative of the selfish individualism that has taken grasp of the US in the first decade of the 21st Century, I think this is it.

By the way, I think the local news stations went a little too far in their 3 hour plus nonstop coverage. After it was known that this wasn't a terrorist attack and that a bomb wasn't involved, there was no need to go on and on about it.

Then again, this did happen on the Upper East $ide, and by now, we all know that whenever the wealthy are threatened then it's a catastrophe and the sign of end times.

In Memoriam: Frank Zeidler

How much times have changed, when politicians are now subject to the same rules as movie stars.

The Day of Interdependence

What is the state of our 230 year old Union on this July 4th?

Still strong?

Still defiant?

Still together?

I think it's at one of its most precarious states, personally.

As is a common theme on the piece of the internet, I truly think that there is so very little that links us together beyond just mere geographic location.

Blue states vs. Red States, Liberals vs. Conservatives vs. Libertarians, and so on and so forth.

It's funny (in a tragicomic way) that in this day and age when you practically have the same stores and utilities in whatever part of the country you're in, that our bonds are increasingly nonexistent.

I wonder what links me to another 27 year old male in, say, Tennessee. We are both citizens of the same country, pay roughly the same taxes, and have the same protections on the federal level.

But do we share the same cultural values?

I don't know. I feel more and more divorced from other Americans, and the sense I've gotten from my friends and comrades is that this isolation is shared.

I'd like to say that our current administration with its mantra of "you're with us or against us" is to blame, but I think it's just a symptom of this new isolation.

Where the crux of it lies is that we have forgotten (and have been forgetting since at least the 1960's, if not earlier) that this is a nation unified by shared ideals and culture. Ideals and culture that are forever evolving, but remaining steadfast to the core belief that all people are created equal and deserving of equal treatment.

So why is it that right now everything must be broken down to black or white terms? Why are we dehumanising each other now when most likely we need each other the most? Why do we refuse point blank to listen?

Because it gets in the way of downloading the latest hits on our iPod-friendly cellphone.

Day of Independence

(Tomorrow is more of a sign of our interdependence rather than independence.)

Last night, the Ex came to visit. Drenched, and with a grin on his face, he gave me a broken clock. It was extremely appropriate in the metaphorical sense.

We were together for a little over 3 years and during that time as is the case in many relationships, there were good and bad times and in our case, a great deal of miscommunication.

I was the one that pulled the plug and as I said at the time, and still hold true to this very day, it would be my mistake if it was the wrong decision.

I do not regret it one bit.

Y'see, in this media-saturated world that we live in, we are told that we are nothing on a daily basis:

• You are nothing if you don't have a significant other.
• You are nothing if you don't look a certain way.
• You are nothing if you don't speak a certain way.
• You are nothing if you don't act a certain way.
• You are nothing if you don't like certain things.

These edicts constrict and contract us to people, situations, and actions that run contrary to who we are. Why? Because they are the beliefs of insecure people who feel the need to claim so-called "power" over others.

And more often than not, we give that power to them, because we're afraid that the person next to us will inflict mob revenge on us if we don't.

Actually breaking up with the Ex was not half as terrifying as the lead up to it. (And yes, I'm cognizant that this is rather trivial compared to being a refugee from Herr Mugabe or Lukashenko.) The lead up was an analytical orgy the likes I had never experienced before. Yet, somehow, I found the shred of determination within to actually go ahead and do it.

And the strangest thing happened afterwards.

I started to feel good about myself, my own Portrait of Dorian Grey disappeared, and was replaced by just myself--unadulterated.

This may not read as radical to most, but for me, this was a 180 degree turn. It's also one that I know I will do my damndest not to reverse.

As The Blade Slides Further Into Irrelevance and Intolerance

This week's Blade features an article (read: puff piece) on Coors trying to mend its reputation with the gay community.

Now since reading The Blade is becoming more and more akin to reading Drudge or Fox News, I can't say that I'm totally surprised to see this indirect love letter to one of the biggest supporters of the Republicans, but one particular passage [in the interview with the Lesbian CEO of the ad agency working with Coors on this endeavour] stands out:

Blade: I certainly don’t mind looking at the guys in the ads. I noticed a predominance of Latino-looking guys. Is that intentional?

Meifert: We found through a lot of very informal polling that Coors Light is the No. 1 beer in a gay space and is huge with the Latino community. We also found out that white guys are really attracted to Latino men, and Latino men are attracted to Latino men. So we decided to go with a Latino flair.

So apparently black, asian, and multiracial men don't matter one iota?

Absolutely charming philosophy to live by.

Because in my mind it's only Tuesday

So it's basically been like The Lost Weekend for me since the end of Pride, except that I've not had that much alcohol. All I know is that I was awake for nearly 72 hours, before the body finally beat out the mind and allowed me to sleep and eat.

I don't know how this happened, but I won't ask for a reason why. Since when I was starting to wonder why I was still awake, Jesus Christ Superstar played on television and scared me silent. (Seriously, "Could We Start Again" is very chilling when you've gone without sleep. Let's not even talk about "Superstar.")

And I've been playing catch-up since then.

What a world to wake up to:

• Four former Wisconsin Governors agree: The Anti-Gay Amendment is basically enshiring bigotry.
• Barbara Walters vs. Star Jones Reynolds, and frankly I'm with Barbara.
• I don't remember all this rain falling!?
• And Mitt Romney is an idiot (part 909).

The View Post-Mortem: Time Does Go By So Slowly

Admittingly, I do not know how to make an entrance, nor do I possess the ability to know when the right time is to even go to a place.

If I did, then I would've had more than just a Corona tonight.

I also would've been able to have avoided or even let slide a large group of twinks singing along to Madonna videos RIGHT IN MY EAR.

Don't get me wrong, I love Madonna, especially from Erotica onwards, and if I had the income, I would've attended her concert at Madison Square Garden tomorrow night, but, jiminy cricket, a person can only take so much.

Now, if they were singing along to Swing Out Sister, then this would totally be my sort of crowd.

After wading through a sea of tight low-cut shirts and sucked-in stomachs, waiting 5 minutes for a beer, and realising that the seat next to the twink posse was the only locale possible. I at least knew that this was my time to leave. (Hey, I had a good Friday night out and another waiting on Sunday, you can't win 'em all.)

In other news, the Hikaruland Pride 2006 Theme Song Committee has chosen Ivana Banfic's "Daj Povedi Me" has for this year's theme song--even though it's from 1991. Just watch the performance and you'll see why.

WORK IT!!!

Why Canadian Politics Are More Fun Than Ours

Let's be honest here, what is the nature of your thoughts when you say 'fuddle duddle'?

Pride Week 2006: A Deeper Love

Once again, it is the time of the year when a significant portion of the LGBT community and our allies come out in force to show that we are defiantly happy of who we are, what we have achieved, and what still lies ahead.

Yet, this is also time when many people come out to say "I'm not like those people."

Despite being subjected to the same legal restrictions, societal prejudice, and the same hatred, still there remain groups who are very quick to point out that they are not like "them."

Who is the mythological "they" which threatens others' sense of security so much that they are quick to disavow any connection?

To some, "they" are effeminate men.

Many times we overhear some gay men saying (with all the venom of a rattlesnake) "if I wanted a woman, then I'd be straight" when an effeminate guy walks past.

But you're not looking at a woman, you're looking a man. A man whose mere existence threatens your insecurity in your own masculinity that you immediately seek to denigrate him for expressing himself in the way that he feels accustomed to. I would hazard a guess that the insecurity these men express has more to do with their own suppressed desires to be themselves.

This self-loathing is quite apparent in the "current" wave of porn that is sold based on the fact that the participants are ostensibly straight men having sex with each other.* While statistically, there must be some heterosexuals who participate in having gay sex on film for money, I would hasten to point out that the money is not that much of an incentive for one to go against one's true orientation. It provides a convenient excuse for those not willing to deal with their true selves, but the pay is negligible at best, and in order to reach the higher echelon (in respect to porn wages), one must truly enjoy homosexual sex.

* Fortunately, there are a great many men who realise that this is a marketing technique with no basis in reality.

There also those who believe that "they" are leather men or others whose sexual practices run contrary to their own.

To be blunt, you just need to give that up. There are politicians and others out there who are so terrified--yes, terrified, because their actions suggest that they feel threatened--of our existence that even hand-holding in public is tantamount to calling for our extermination.

To others, "they" are those who aren't a certain definition of what is physically attractive.

What all this talk of "they" boils down to is insecurity. Let's be honest here, we are beat down every day. All of us: gay and straight, male and female, all races, all people, all nationalities. No one likes it, but it's true. It takes a great deal of energy to wake up in the morning and say that we are ready to greet the world at large. I do mean "greet" instead of "face." "Face" suggests that we are preparing to go into combat with others and that we're already in an adversarial mindset. How rare is it for us to actually "greet the world?" Instead of propping ourselves up with how we are different from others and how others have ruined the world, why not just think "I am" and "you are." Just those two phrases without any qualifiers or descriptions after them.

It is extremely surprising that this is a radical concept and something that we are still dealing with, lo these many years after Stonewall, but honestly, why can't we just take this venom that we set upon each other and use it for change that benefits all of us, instead of ourselves and our clones?

Then maybe, we'd actually find out what it means to be happy and loved.

Thursday Jukebox Likes The Occasional Ballad

...especially when they talk about loss.

Whether delivered by a Swedish operatic tenor



Or by a waitress and a bunch of women in lingerie.

Is This A Good Thing?

The new CBC lineup for Fall 2006. It's heavy on the reality (or "factual entertainment" as the department is styled).

My need to immigrate grows.

The Stonewall-View Post-Mortem: Seeing the world through new eyes

3 Tonic Waters, 1 beer, and 5 Twisted Teas.

My body must be changing, because I would think that amount wouldn't do me in, but for some reason it has.

The Stonewall seems to not be in that much of a music video mode--at least when I'm there--because the past 2 times I've been there, I've seen movies playing with music in the background. Granted this week, the bartender (who is younger than me) was playing a lot of rap as well as Gnarls Barkley's "Crazy" in a loop, so my ears were soothed. (I'm referring to "Crazy," not the rap.)

Ultimately, I wound up talking with a guy who seemed to be addicted to editing others' work. I don't quite get the appeal, but he was all for it. More power to him.

The View however was in full-tilt music video mode, hence the overload on Twisted Teas.

One video played there was a remix the current LL Cool J song "Control Myself." Now, I have to wonder about Mr. Smith. He's pushing 40, isn't he? I don't know what his secret is, but I just have to wonder if he isn't dipping in the well of HGH. And considering that I've only heard the remix version of it, I also have to wonder if Jennifer Lopez's parts are all altered by the vocoder as well.

Also at The View, I wound up talking with the new bartender, who looked at the same time very familiar and yet new. It's rare for me to experience deja-vu, but I certainly did.

I guess I should get to the point of this entry's subtitle.

Well, let's just say that the right type of guy can change one's perspective, particularly if one is practically a Mt. Everest in the romance arena, like me.

I'm loaded, so vague riddles when it comes to the personal are easier to write.