500th Post (Observed): A Special Hikaruland Tribute

"The most pathetic and tragic thing in the world is someone on their death bed who realises that all the holistic endeavors they took were for naught, and my experience has taught that most people in the world go out like that. Conversely, I will remember that I had happy moments and I never tried to hinder them, even if they came in the form of nicotine." --Hikaru

Hikaru's tales of Booze, Misadventures, Pop Culture and Socialism began only a year and 2 months ago. Miraculously, and interestingly he has opened himself up to the world in 500 posts (Yes! Dear Readers, 500 posts!) most bloggers traditionally would have done.

His looks have changed, his body has changed, his views have become stronger, and his life of debauchery. . . well, uh... that will never change. Afterall, what would you expect from a Black-Korean from Milwaukee, transported to the Chelsea district in NYC?

I've compiled some of the Best Looks of Hikaru (well, I tried, but thanks to Blogger, I'm having technical difficulties uploading the collection) as well as a recap of some of the most memorable posts.

January 2005
Hikaru stuns us with his family tale, "Dad Upstaged Me" comparing the feelings toward his father's death to his own birthday. A definite must-read to understand, early-on, in Hikaruland, the deep-rooted infrastructure of ideals and habits that follows throughout the remaining posts.

February 2005
February, Hikaru begins to learn to trust himself in his writing, and opens himself up by admitting he understands why people stay away from "drunk sex". In "A Temporary Halt" Hikaru's tongue-in-cheek type of humor, overshadowed with pure realism debates cigarette smoking and marijuana smoking.

March 2005
Brief crushes play a role in the month of March. We also discover that Hikaru is well versed in NY Jets (Does this surprise anyone? It does me!). We are also introduced to, what will become a weekly event, "The Splash: Post Mortem", revealing his whereabouts and happenings while he attempts to drink anyone under the table, as he channels his inner black woman.

April 2005
Diversity is added in Hikaruland when Hikaru offers brief movie reviews, and advice on what to do when someone tries to seduce you in a bathroom stall., in another Splash: Post Mortem tale. "The Sex Missive" somehow mentions the Pope, Zimbabwe, and Pornographic in one sentence, showing us Hikaru is truly the saint we deem him from day 1.

May 2005
We finally see a side of Hikaru that embraces pop culture (or, at least the irony of it) as he promotes the Britney &. Kevin: Chaotic television show. And, unsurprisingly we see he doesn’t lose his quick-wittedness, but strengthens his narcissistic tendencies as we’re thrown into his realm of his surgery to tighten his stomach. Even his post-surgery posting was a bit too much for Bougie Black Boy to read.

June 2005
Hikaru finally showers after his 6-day recovery from his tummy tuck, but still pretending to be an angry black woman in disguise claiming that, “Heifer, please don’t fuck with me! I’m all swoll up!” This swollenness puts an instant halt on his sexlife, smoking, work-outs, and drinking. What’s left for him? Well, he can write. Except June shows us that Hikaru had a bad writers block.

July 2005
Hikaru realizes his singlehood and proclaims that he must find a husband. Only thing—he has a long-ass criteria list. His readership begins to increase as he delves into topics comparing the rights of gays/lesbians to that of blacks and how the struggles are somewhat synonymous. His self-indulgence is fulfilled during his self-interview.

August 2005
Admittedly, Hikaru admits that “August is not my smart month”, yet dives into homo erotic (it seems?!) fair tales, stirring his creative juices to write his own homage. However, finally we are able to see WHY Hikaru considers himself a socialist and how his views compare to that of the NYC chapter. His confidence in his previous stomach surgery to rid himself of the extra skin, seems to be boosted as he posts a new, improved Hikaru picture.

September 2005
A reflection of Katrina victims is mentioned while he admits that he can get sloshed on a weekly basis, and how he refuses to wear socks until it’s 20 degrees – (ashy ankles?!). If Bougie Black Boy would have seen this post earlier, I would have commented, but he mentions “New York’s Uncle Tom’s and Aunt Condoleeza’s” which reveals a campaign for African-Americans for Mayor Bloomberg.

October 2005
Hikaru gives us a list of “famous Hikarus” throughout time, some real, some anime as he pulls in gay icon Madonna who gets crunk in her (then) latest video. We also learn about his 6-inch box, for his personal space he needs around him. Only a select few (me included! J ) get to get within a 2-inch space. Hikaru takes a stand and admits that we must have a National Turn Off Your Cell Phone day. This month, two things made him cry: Rosa Parks’ death, and the episode of Noah’s Ark on LOGO channel.

November 2005
Splash Post-Mortem Nights begin to evolve into other venues, strengthening his debaucherous ways. He writes extensively in two posts about middle-aged black men (like him? Nah!), and comparing himself to his American Idol (ha!) Tyler Perry. His writing suffers because he’s blogging so much, and he realizes that his personal writing assignments are piling up.

December 2005
Hikaru takes his writing by its balls and tackles 75% of his writing endeavors, returning him from his brief sabbatical. He becomes a bit more technologically savvy, and posts music videos on his blog – quite an entertaining addition. We begin to realize that Hikaru has quite a talent in his Post Mortem episodes with his brief reviews. Perhaps, he’ll be a bar/club reviewer sometime in the near future? Hikaru offers a recap (his version (not mine)) of 2005.

January 2006
Hikaru begins the year with a new blog look, and during his drunken nights makes references to Ralph Ellison at Splash Bar, and contemplates the validity of a date at a 24-hour diner. By choice, he takes Viagra (like he needs it!) for the hell of it, but nothing happens, disappointingly. Several times, Hikaru runs into his old one-night stands.

February 2006
Hikaru wakes up in a pool of vomit. Has his Post Mortem nights caught up with him? We’d think he had a cast-iron stomach now. But perhaps we’re wrong. His online video uploads seemingly overshadows the copy (in an entertaining, interactive sort of way). We finally get to see his views on Narcissism, and how he considers it the Fourth Sexual Orientation.

March 2006
His island cruise begins and completes as we see a new Hikaru in a Panama Jack hat, and a polo shirt, seemingly to make him look angelic, cherub-esque. But as we read about his wanton behavior we understand that those pouty lips and bedroom eyes are real, not just innocence.

Question remains--How much longer will Hikaru Blog? And is this simply the foundation for an extensive writing project he's been working on?