Thursday, May 08, 2008

Thursday Jukebox Is On The Ho Stroll

Yes, I said it, "ho." Now let me explain.

Namie Amuro has a new video out. Well, it's not really hers as it's a duet with DOUBLE (who is really one person, but originally the name of a sister act, except it isn't anymore--see wiki.theppn for more). DOUBLE has got a really good voice, but--how shall I put this politely--her image encourages the viewer to pay attention to things other than her singing...a bit like Mariah Carey (in her current I-know-you-want-my-cookie phase).

Anyway, DOUBLE has a collaboration album coming out soon and her duet with Ms. Amuro, Black Diamond is the lead off single.



A pretty decent song and video, but the choreography and styling! Poor DOUBLE and Namie looked like they should be doing the ho stroll in Hell's Kitchen (and I swear I've seen amateur drag queens do the moves they did during the dance break).
By the way, the chorus can be read in a very interesting way if you apply my crackpot theory about diamonds to it, and look closely at the extras. (I know they're saying "when you meet a guy who's fly," but drag kings do use the male pronoun.)

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

God Save Those of US With an IQ over 30

Yesterday, the Daily News featured Sarah Jessica Parker's annoyance with Sex & The City girls taking over New York. Now, it brings us the story of how Gossip Girl is trying to recapture the same magic, via the glory that is a modern-day advertising offensive (in both senses of the word).

I manage to avoid Times Square, so the billboards aren't that big a deal (hell, I had one staring at me for several months--by the way, every single male cast member of that show looks identical), but these "IT guides" give me a bit of worry. Apart from the spate of foolish suburban girls getting robbed/carjacked/murdered every other weekend, there's one other concern: these fools will be strolling down 7th Avenue at all hours looking for these "hot places," while 99% of us will be trying to get from point A to B.

I'm not too keen on these talking billboards either.

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

And What Are You Going To Do About It, Sarah?

Sarah Jessica Parker admits that New York City has lost its "creative energy," in a Daily News article. Admitting culpability, however, doesn't look like it's forthcoming, despite what Matthew Broderick (her husband) says.

Saturday, May 03, 2008

Saturday Jukebox is a Soulhead

Maybe I just have a dirty mind due to the Supahead controversy, but Soulhead does kind of sound a little bit risque as a name for a Japanese R&B/Hiphop duo, especially if they're sisters.

Nonetheless, I think they're ace.

First off, the scorching hot video for Fiesta--No prizes for guessing the inspiration, especially if you remember the early 1990s.



Soulhead - Fiesta
Uploaded by False_I_Love_You


Then there's Feel Like Jumping, which looks like it was tailormade for Sesame Street. (FWIW, there is nothing on the planet more sugary than Japanese children's television, so it seems the director allowed the sisters maintain a shred of urban cred.)



SOULHEAD - FEEL LIKE JUMPING
Uploaded by Ozro77

If anyone could explain the video to Sparkle Train, I'd be very grateful. I don't quite get what a suburban train station in pre-revolutionary Shanghai has to do with dedicating a song to "my homies strugglin' through." (Unless the director is showing sympathy for the Chiang Kai-Shek government.)


Dash05da023
Uploaded by dadacha
And finally, the video for Get Up. I can't read the writing at the airport scene (I'm guessing it's Ishigaki, which is part of Okinawa) , so I can't say exactly where the video is shot, but doesn't it just make you want to jump on a plane to wherever it takes place?



SAGging

Uh oh, the rumblings of a SAG strike grow ever closer.

Friday, May 02, 2008

Hikaruland Vs. April

While much has gone on during my absence, it could also be argued that very little has. I'm not really going to debate that, but I'm going to try to pounce on the big stories of April (at least the ones that I've heard).
  • Obama-Wright: Personally, I think it's all asinine. I don't disagree with anything that Wright has said (based on the snippets I've heard so far), but the debacle is further proof that people forget that there is a way to communicate your message. I also think that Obama should've realised LOOOOONG before he launched into his candidacy that perhaps this association may be a liability.
  • Obama the candidate: It's not really been a secret on here, but I'm finally going to say it out loud. I don't support Obama at the moment. Should he win the nomination, I'll vote for him without reservation. This moment in time, however, I just have trouble understanding why he feels the need to run now, nor do I feel that he should. The issues that he has right now illustrate his naivete and to some degree his arrogance with the rest of us. He just comes across to me as that smug vegan with their own backyard garden that feels the need to lecture you about how sinful you are for not living the way he does. I'd love to see a black president, but he doesn't strike me as the one to bring that to fruition. The only plus he seems to have is that he does not have Bush or Clinton in his name.
  • Beijing 2008: This is going to be a shitstorm. Full stop. Not on the level of Munich 1972, but it's going to get ugly.
  • Delta-Northwest & United-US Airways: I'm actually for these mergers. Emotionally, I wish Northwest was the surviving carrier, because I think they will be dragged down by Delta, but the weirdness that the market is in dictates that Delta should be the survivor. As for United-US Airways, it also makes sense, in that United gets a serious foothold on the East Coast (that Dulles hub is a joke for domestic connections) , and reinforces its European stance. Cruelly, poor US Airways will barely get a chance to operate its China routes before being swallowed up by United.
  • That photo in Vanity Fair: I am constantly amazed that celebrities forget that the puritan mindset that formed the US persists to this day. The American public likes being shocked, but they also (or at least make the appearance of being so) like to see a good modern day witch hunt. My advice to the next teen star anxious to make the transition: do it and say nothing at all.
  • Actors Strike?: On a completely petty level, I'd like to see SAG tarred and feathered the way the WGA was during their strike; however, the WGA strike delayed production so much, and a SAG strike with mess up the 2008-09 season, so I hope they resolve it. (Plus SAG stood by the WGA, it's only fair to do the same to them.)
  • Zimbabwe: Just give up, Mugabe. You'd think he'd at least try to get rid of the Hitler moustache already.
  • I thought she was dead: Laurie Bembenek is appealing to the US Supreme Court. This case is almost as old as I am. I don't think she did it, but there comes a time when you just accept that you can't win.

May Day 2008

It seems appropriate to resume action at this corner of the Internet on May Day.

Where are we as of 2008?
  • The US manufacturing base is decimated. (Want proof? Go to China, Indonesia, or Vietnam and see the difference in prices for consumer goods.)
  • Lack of economic foresight or just sheer disdain for others is allowing a chasm between the haves and have-nots. Not that this all that shocking, but the fact of the matter is that the face of the have-nots is becoming more diverse with each passing month. The day of people applying for food stamps in Ralph Lauren sounds probable.
  • Golden Parachutes are still happening.
  • On the positive side, the notion of Universal Health Care has begun to edge its way to the forefront of national dialogue. (As to why it took so long to even get to this level, I have no clue. That said, we're only now realising that trickle-down economics does not work.)
  • As isolationist as this sounds, I think that the EU and/or the PRC usurping the US's role on the international stage is a good thing. Too many years of looking outwards has left our house in disarray, and as I see it, getting our house in order seems to be the theme of Campaign 2008.

So perhaps May Day 2009 will see the US taking action--as opposed to rhetoric--towards its citizens. Perhaps, just perhaps, Americans will realise that government has the responsibility to protect its citizens, not just arbiter disputes.

I'll be optimistic.

Tuesday, April 01, 2008

Monday Jukebox Says Southern Wind, Carry Me Away

There's a lot of posts today, and the main reason is this: I'm going to be away for the month of April.

In fact going very far away (geographically that is) for a business/leisure trip.

Here's a hint:



By the way, here are the lyrics (courtesy of All About Akina Nakamori):

I am being greeted by the sea breeze
Naturally, my body sways to the rhyme
Touring a Panama hat round and round with my finger
The glass of fruit wine that is delivered to my table

is a message from a stranger
I am mesmerised by the intense glare beyond my shoulders

I realise that I have my legs locked to a white chair
and held my chin in my hands
The mood is slightly like in a movie
I tidy my hair melancholically
A dangerous heart


Under the silhouette created by coconut leaves
I take a brief rest
ignoring the piercing stare
The boys who are distracted (by me)

gazed over at me from the seaside
Unexpectedly, a beautiful boy
on a white yacht waves to me
Those dazzling eyes
The boys who were distracted (by me) call out to me at the hotel window

Twisting my washed hair
I winked mischievously at them
Is this dangerous?

Three more hints:
  • It's not Japan.
  • It's not Panama
  • And technically, I'm going Southwest, but Southwest Airlines doesn't fly there.

This Is Payback

An interesting article today on 365gay about a married NYC gay couple who are working for tolerance in Poland after their wedding pictures were used by the Polish president in order to stir up anti-gay feelings and reject the EU charter of rights.

Gives us all hope, I reckon.

Hikaruland Eurovision 2008 Preview Reviews: The Top 5

Here's the player...just so you can have a quick refresher:

Eurovision Song Contest - Belgrade 2008 Preview Player

Picking my top 5 was actually quite tricky because while there was no doubt about which entries would take the top 2 spots, 3rd, 4th & 5th places were tough calls.
  1. Ukraine: Ani Lorak, her weapons of male destruction, an AIDS ribbon, and a disco-happy orchestration, made Ukraine easily my favourite for this year. When you think about it, the video is basically a very aggressive remake of Diamonds Are A Girl's Best Friend from Gentlemen Prefer Blondes. I like camp, I'll praise it, and I'm not afraid to admit it.
  2. Turkey: I like my rock driving, aggressive with a touch of menace to it, like a Hitchcock thriller. Even better, the lyrics, performance, and mise-en-scene bring the crazy...literally.
  3. France: Considering that the theme this year seems to be pastiche, it seems appropriate that the French entry (even though it's practically all in English--although "chivers" is not a word I've ever heard off, and I believe Sebastien is being intentional by writing it that way as opposed to "shivers") , would do the best job in pulling it off superbly, and with New Wave to boot. Note to several other participants this year (whose names I won't mention): the video for Divine also manages to best illustrate absurd comedy, which doesn't mean throwing everything plus the kitchen sink at the viewer.
  4. Malta: The lyrics are very campy (and a touch absurd and dated--why would you sing about spying in Russia at a contest held in Serbia?), the music is driving, and the very visually stimulating video pretty much expresses both with a possibly unintentional homage to Benny Hill. Very effective, but not quite unique or quirky enough to launch it into the top 3.
  5. Romania: This was an extremely tough call, but ultimately, Nico & Vlad brought the crazy, and deserve to be awarded for it. The lyrics aren't that interesting, but their OTT performance (Nico's losing her mind, Vlad is trying to calm her down like a good co-dependent boy toy, neither of them fazed by the fact that they are in the middle of a Romanian beach/garbage dump/orchestra rehearsal space wearing formal wear) is just too hilarious and engaging to be bogged down by lyrical blandness.

Honourable mentions

  • Hungary: Starts out visually striking, but sputters midway. What is the symbolism for the running Doberman?
  • United Kingdom: It's cool, slick, and makes you want to dance. Only out of the top 5 (and just barely) because crazy, camp, and angst-driven rock can't help but stand out from the crowd. Sly Stone revival!
  • Spain: Offensive lyrics about mixed-race women being easy aside, the general joke does come across (particularly to Americans--although we have no televoting rights, so that's a bit of a misfire), and there really is some wit about it. It's really a straightforward parody in execution, but of who and what, we cannot say. The cheap quality works, however.
  • Ireland: Unlike the Spanish joke entry, the Irish joke is much broader, and here again, the cheapness works. It's meant to be outlandish and poke fun at Irish Eurovision history. Dustin's voice, however, can be a little grating and hard to decipher, but that oddly works in the video's favour. (Along with the constant zooms the camera makes.)

Ukraine can probably add another year of coming in 2nd to its record, but they aren't going to win it.

Monday, March 31, 2008

Hikaruland Eurovision 2008 Preview Reviews: Day 4

First and foremost, I'd like to direct to you to a very hilarious and enjoyable Eurovision site: Whoops Dragovic, run by Jamie McLoughlin, considering all the work he's done for the constantly updating the site's Encyclopedia Eurovisica, he deserves praise on the level of Cleopatra entering Rome.

All tight, all right, here's the official ESC player:

Eurovision Song Contest - Belgrade 2008 Preview Player

Get your sibilants at your side, we're going from San Marino to Switzerland...the long way.

  • San Marino: Many years ago, I used to daydream about being the Sanmarinese entrant for Eurovision (Seriously, I did.) The national final was a joint project between MTV Italy and SMRTV and the atmosphere was more like Glastonbury rather than Melodifestivalen. Good times. Anyway, imagine my total shock when I found out that: a) San Marino really was entering Eurovision, and b) they'd pick a electro-rock band. The video is very similar to the one from Montenegro this year, however there are no big-haired women lying in bed, nor do the lads seem to be interested in doing pastiche. (Well, they're letting the old buildings do that work.) It's not all that terribly interesting, nor does it really work with the lyrics, and as much as I like Complice, the video for Deli does angst (along with menace) much better.
  • Serbia: I hope it's established between all of us here, that when it comes to these preview reviews, I don't do objectivity. I am prepared to be surprised (Romania & Malta) or dismayed (San Marino & Finland), but I definitely come into this with favourites. While I'm certain that Jelena Tomašević is a lovely and talented singer, the fact remains that her song/Serbia's entry is composed by the same man who is also doing co-hosting duties this year. That looks a bit wrong to me. It doesn't help that I also despise these droning ballads about god-knows-what that Serbia invariably sends, when there are so many more interesting uptempo songs at Beovizija. Perhaps you have to be Serbian to really be moved by it, but by the same token marija lang did this same thing last year and won the contest itself, so there is an audience for torch songs. Rant over, let's get back to the video. It's the national final (RTS, you are hosting the whole contest this year, WTF? Bring your A-game.) performance. The staging is similar to the one for Moldova: Jelena sings, the backing performers do avant-garde theatrics behind her, and everyone looks solemn. The song also reminds me A LOT of Nocturne, except instead of a violin solo occupying the majority of the performance, we have folk dancing and clarinets. It goes without saying that Jelena doesn't even think of bringing the crazy.
  • Slovenia: I thought Rebeka was going to be singing in English! She may very well do so in Belgrade, but the preview video is the Slovenian version. Borrowing heavily from Alenka's successful sex-laden preview from last year, former Miss Slovenia does more of the same, except she's taking the angrier techno-laden route. Miss Slovenia is pissed at her swarthy man. Wait, maybe she really is into him. No, she hates him. It's a sped-up version of Justify My Love in Slovenian. Not bad, although it could be a little more risque, given that Alenka's video set the bar a bit higher for Slovene preview videos.
  • Spain: Even though I have been wondering when Spain would get around to using reggaeton, I have to say I wasn't expecting it in a comedy number. (By the way, eurovision.tv writers, reggaeton has basically been appearing for several years already in Macedonia's entries masquerading as turbo-folk, but the beats and structure are not all that different.) If we are to believe his bio, then Rodolfo is apparently Argentinian, and that is not all that surprising to me. The entry looks and sounds like a late-night comedy skit on Sabado Grande (and yes, I know Don Francisco is Chilean, but still). The video is very basic, but--let's be honest--the joke wouldn't work if it was done with lots of money: Rodolfo and two very harshly made-up backing dancers (who look like Patricia Kraus) dance around to tinny synthesiser with shaky images of bikini-clad women jumping about in the background. If you read the lyrics, it is actually quite funny, name-checking a bunch of international celebrities, politicians, and even the state of Oregon. (For those of us who have been subjected to the constantly playing if the iO digital cable reggaeton ad, you have to keep yourself from wanting to sing "877-393-4448!" during the refrain.) I'm quite surprised that I kind of like it--albeit after reading the lyrics. Nonetheless, I cannot say that I'm all that pleased with the "mulata" lyric. (Actually, I'm rather pissed off about it, frankly. It could be argued that might be part of the "joke," as he is "Argentinian" and Argentines have the stereotype of believing themselves of being superior to those from the Caribbean and the rest of Southern & Central America, but the song did not need to go there.) I doubt we'll ever find out if that's the intent. Verdict: a draw, due to that lyric, but probably the better of the comedy entries this year.
  • Sweden: Catwoman is back! (I don't want to necessarily link to her picture, but doesn't Charlotte remind you of Jocelyn Widenstein?) Anyway, it's her MF performance, which tries to borrow as much as possible from Lena Ph, without actually building upon it. First off, Lena got onstage and it was clear from the beginning that she OWNED it. Charlotte, conversely just rents a minorly significant portion. She half-asses the Swedish strut (again, see Lena Ph & Nanne for examples of it done properly), and never connects with the camera. Although she looks very Amanda Lepore-esque, Charlotte doesn't even use that to her advantage. (Just imagine what this would look like if David LaChappelle was staging this.) She just does a two-step, smiles, turns, does another two-step, and smiles, over and over again, and I can't help but think she has no idea what she's singing about. (Not that the lyrics make any sense either, so I'll cut her some slack on that.) As was very astutely pointed out, Charlotte is totally overshadowed by her Charlotte 2.0 backing singers/dancers, which might explain why it's only midway through that they appear. Very very bland. If this was an off year, Charlotte would totally walk all over the scoreboard, this year (and in my view, the quality of Eurovision entries has vastly improved since 2001--2 years after Charlotte's win at the relatively weak 1999 contest), the chances are less than 50% for Sweden to get out of the semi.
  • Switzerland: If I had to summarise this year's Swiss entry, it would be "Some kid whines about idealism like it's 1967." Paolo may be 31, but he certainly looks like he's barely over 18. After a pleasant, if not poorly executed diversion into camp last year, the Swiss are back to their old tricks: hiring a foreigner to sing about the guilt the Swiss have for being Swiss (read: rich) in a world surrounded by non-Swiss (read: those of us who don't live in tax havens with liberal banking laws). The video looks like it was shot in Los Angeles, and that makes me interpret it as a "Swiss" (Paolo's the co-creator, and I don't think he is Swiss) take on the film Crash (the one about LA's socio-economic strife, not the one about people getting off on car crashes). Why exactly? Well, we have a fresh-from-a-Bennetton-ad group of diverse ethnicities (complete with dance-offs last seen in Rize!), we have fighting, and we have Paolo whining about how it hurts him when people can't get along. Paolo takes this theme even further by acting all angsty in a nightclub. The tempo picks up and Paolo starts bopping around, even managing to--gasp--smile. The video switches from Crash to Fame, because everybody (except for Paolo) starts dancing together, and the symbolism is so blatant and stomach-churning that I am glad I haven't had anything to eat this morning. The one thing I can't quite comprehend is this: why on Earth was this video shot in LA, especially for an entry representing one of Europe's historically diverse countries? (It's not like they couldn't get the same point across in Zurich or Geneva--hell, even Lugano.)

Let me just say that this was a really tough round to pick 3 from: Serbia & Sweden didn't bother to film anything new; the Swiss entry was well-filmed, but the message was disingenuous, Slovenia wasn't really ground-breaking (especially in respect to prior Slovene entries), Spain's jokes didn't really come across that well, and the Sanmarinese video was rather pedestrian, especially when compared with this year's Turkish entry. Nonetheless, here's the top 3.

  1. Switzerland (it was well shot, although the symbolism was too heavy-handed).
  2. Slovenia (Nothing new, but at least interesting)
  3. Spain (the cheapness works, even though the jokes got a little too offensive for my comfort level)

Coming up very soon: the Top 5 of all this year's previews.

The Actors Go To War

...with each other.

SAG (film actors) & AFTRA (TV/Radio actors) will negotiate their contracts separately. Frankly, after the things hurled at the writers during our recent strike, I hope that neither side goes to strike--but--if one side does, I really hope it's SAG. The sheer comedy of seeing that lot trapsing around Universal City with picket signs would be worth it.

Yes, I have a heavy pro-TV bias.

Sunday, March 30, 2008

The Machine or Apathy

59% of local races in Southeastern Wisconsin are uncontested.

Is it apathy?

Fear of getting involved?

The local machine?

And is this situation playing out across the nation?

Saturday, March 29, 2008

Hikaruland Eurovision 2008 Preview Reviews: Day 3 Special

A little vlog extra...My own highly-biased (and out of sync) top 3 of the remainders (S-U).


Hikaruland Eurovision 2008 Preview Reviews: Day 3

Iceland to Russia...The long way.

Eurovision Song Contest - Belgrade 2008 Preview Player


  • Iceland: Live video from somewhere (the national final version was in Icelandic), and thank god for that, because the actual video for the song looked like some cheap CGI horror. Did you know that Paul Oscar is behind this entry? Note the toned-down versions of his 1997 backup dancers in the background. The staging is not as in-your-face as Palli's previous Eurosong entry--which could be a metaphor for Euroland either becoming more conservative or more liberal. Nonetheless, it sounds and looks like some Melodifestivalen cast-off...not necessarily a bad thing mind you.
  • Ireland: The controversial Turkey! Actually, of all the comedy numbers this year, this is the only one that I find genuinely funny and entertaining. Considering that the Irish are quite well-regarded for their sense of humour, it's shocking that it's taken them this long to finally take the piss out of themselves. The video starts out very solemn with Dustin in silhouette and then breaks into a slightly less manic version of Silvia Night's preview video complete with Turkey-dressed backing singers, a turn table, Dustin going manic all over the place while old Eurovision entries are shown in the background. Sneakily, the video also pokes fun of the contest itself, but not in a mean-spirited way.
  • Israel: Kdam performance? I am continually amazed by the fact that Boaz has that kind of singing voice coming out of that body (which, I must add is very pleasing to the eye as well, if I can sound lecherous for a moment). The underlying theme of this year's songs seems to be pastiche and this song is no different. Remember all those solemn Israeli ballads back in the 1980s & 90s? Well, take those add on Niamh Kavanagh's staging and you have this year's Israeli entry. Well-performed, but a touch dull. Surprisingly, one of the minds behind this song is Dana International.
  • Latvia: There is comedy, there is inanity, and both are subjective. In my view, Dustin is the former, and The Pirates of the Sea are the latter. It's the national final performance, and boy, does this look like they are trying to mimic Ruslana! The main problem is just that Wild Dances was engaging with a touch of menace about it. Wolves of the Sea, however, looks like something that Rednex would come up with if they were asked to appear on children's television. Blech.
  • Lithuania: National final performance. Jerominas tries out for the lead in Jesus Christ Superstar. Unfortunately, he seems to forget that Judas actually has the more interesting numbers in that show. (Jesus comes across as some whiny hippie who just lets things happen to him.) Jerominus also fails to bring the crazy, which is the only way I could tolerate this song. Next!
  • Malta: I know that IBA is always cash-strapped, so they get an excuse, but why can't Latvia & Lithuania kick in some money for proper videos, especially when ickle Malta manages to always come up with impressive visual stunners for their MOR entries. Vodka, however, is actually a cut above the usual Maltese milquetoast. The video starts out like an espionage film with Morena as the star. When the song actually starts, it becomes like Benny Hill does James Bond with Morena as the sexy spy eluding her clueless pursuers with a happy-go-lucky synthesiser accompaniment. Not too shabby.
  • Moldova: National final performance. TVM is cash-strapped, so we'll cut them some slack. Musically, this is quite pleasing. Lyrically and performance-wise, it's a sheer mess. Geta appears to be singing in English, but her pronunciation is very mangled. Meanwhile, her backing performers play musical chairs and act oblivious to the point of blowing bubbles and talking on their mobiles. Is this theatre of the absurd?
  • Montenegro: Attention LTV & LRTV, even Montenegro has a proper video! That said, Montenegro--again--thinks that 80s pop-rock is due for a comeback, because this looks like some random Journey or Foreigner video. Stefan has rickets in front of old buildings while a band plays in the background and trashy women look on between lolling about in bed wearing lingerie. Perhaps if I go to Montenegro, I'll magically turn into a child again since it seems to be perpetually 1987 there. (The man is wearing a sweater vest, people! A sweater vest!)
  • Netherlands: Speaking of acting like a child, the Dutch preview video is all about Hind doing just that. She cavorts around a playroom, kicking big balls, having ice cream, and playing with her pigtails. Right before things become a little too uncomfortable, the video switches to Hind just singing the song (thank god). The song itself is not too bad, but not all that spectacular. That said, it may very well take the Dutch into the final based on the "middle always rises to the top" theory.
  • Norway: National final performance, the song starts out like a ballad then becomes mildly midtempo R&B. That is somewhat of a relief, as it becomes clearly evident that Maria will not bring the crazy. This song is as close as we will get this year to acknowledging the success of Amy Winehouse & Co., but as I mentioned before, Maria is not going to bring the crazy. In fact, she smiles while singing lyrics that would suggest something along the lines of a grimace. Perhaps she is bringing the crazy then. Another candidate for "middle rising to the top."
  • Poland: With a name like Isis Gee, one would think she'd sing some big house song or something thrash rock. Nope, it's another ballad. Isis is very pretty, very buxom, and very tan. She kind of looks like a toned-down version of Jordan, actually. The video appears to be all about Isis imagining/remembering her wedding day. If the US ever entered a Eurovision-style contest, this would be our entry, because this bland stuff sells by the bucketloads here. Isis does not bring the crazy, but she does bring some slight diva-ness. The ballad freaks will love it.
  • Portugal: National final performance. Babic is written all over this staging even if he actually isn't in it (dramatic poses by the backing singers, et. al). The styling and performance however, is essentially the same as Andorra's quite impressive 2006 entry, although Vania does not even come close to attacking the stage like Jenny did. Impressive overall, and might get a very good reception on the scoring board. Vania, sadly, never fully brings the crazy though. (Did no one take notes from La Vissi in 2006?)
  • Romania: We're seaside. Vlad (I'm assuming the man's name is Vlad, but you can never be too certain) gestures dramatically at a seashell. Nico (I'm assuming that's Nico) then appears and gestures dramatically at Vlad. She is also dressed like she just left some East Village night club...in 1984, especially when she's taunting a bunch of clocks with her razor-like hand gestures. (Are Romanian beaches also garbage dumps? Inquiring tourists want to know.) Believe it or not, these two actually bring some degree of crazy: Nico is going batshit and Vlad is busy trying to use his puppy-dog eyes and soft features to calm her down. The fact that they are clearly not in beach gear and are accompanied by a sizable orchestra at the beach, indicates that crazy truly has arrived. Therefore, I like it. A lot. I certainly wasn't expecting to either.
  • Russia: National final performance. Even with Timbaland producing, this song never manages to be either: a) catchy, b) interesting. Dima (complete with scruff and sans mullet) looks like a deer caught in the headlights of an oncoming car. What is this car that Dima sees? Is it that he has lost control of his career? Himself? Does he feel bad about voting for Putin mk. II? Just what is going on in his mind? (Answer: Pout. Blink. Pout. Blink.) By the way, his pronunciation actually sounds worse than it did in 2006. Unfortunately, this will score highly, because pouting and preening always do well, and Dima will probably be drawn and quartered if he doesn't reach the final.

Top 3 Preview Videos for this round:

  1. Malta
  2. Romania
  3. Ireland

There's a bit of a gulf between Romania & Ireland, but Malta & Romania are very close.

Next up: The remaining entries, including the inanity that is this year's Spanish & Swedish entries, and the coolness that is this year's British, Sanmarinese, Turkish, and Ukrainian entries.

Friday, March 28, 2008

Is T5 Jive?

The hype behind Heathrow's new Terminal 5 came crashing down yesterday, as everything went balls up with the conveyor belt.

Perhaps fears of lost luggage keeps the UK from winning Eurovision.

Off-topic update: This post marks the 900th entry for Hikaruland, which has been going for 3 1/4 years. I don't know which fact shocks me more.

Thursday, March 27, 2008

The Hikaruland Eurovision 2008 Preview Reviews: Day 2

Eurovision.tv is getting high-tech, so here is the player:


Eurovision Song Contest - Belgrade 2008 Preview Player

And now onto D-H

  • Denmark: More vintage. Simon seems to think that he is George Michael circa Faith. He gets a shave, smiles at a pretty girl, and then becomes a policeman singing in front of 40s-50s era cars. I've been to Copenhagen at night, it's a little more lively than Mr. Matthew's video suggests.
  • Estonia: Eurolaul performance (I think). A bunch of bikini-clad women swing Estonian flags while three overweight men "sing" and bounce to the beat of a song which seems to be Serbian, but could very well be a combination of that and drunken Estonian. (One would have to be half in the bag to make those two sound alike.) Bikini woman holds up a sign of a cake or a pie. I should also mention that the Baltic Bears are dressed in the Estonian national colours, which is making some very bizarre national statement or just aiming for comedy of the bizarre (and failing, albeit not horrendously so).
  • Finland: Euroviisut performance: I've seen the actual video and it's got more oomph than its Eurosong counterpart. First disclaimer: I actually like this song, it's campy without the daftness of Lordi. Second disclaimer: The lads aren't that bad looking to the eyes (in that funfair-operator-who-you'd-do-when-you're-drunk-on-cheap-beer way).  They had better keep this in Finnish, because it would lose its "what exactly are they screaming about" appeal.
  • France: Inspired by Xanadu or any of the assorted musicals from the late 1970s-early 1980s which tried to bring New Wave to the masses? Man plays organ while 2 pale white feminine beings (gender ambiguous on my screen) "sing" "bop-bop-doo-wop." M. Tellier turns around and for a second I think "Frank Zappa isn't really dead. He's just gone into hiding as a Frenchman." And then it gets trippy: microphones being tossed as Francois Zappa goes from soundstage to street to beach to car. By the way, M. Tellier and/or the director pays attention to detail when it comes to film stock, which really makes this video look as if it was some recently rediscovered New Wave song from 1980. Brilliant. 
  • (FYR) Macedonia: National final performance, because they are singing in Macedonian (although it will be in garbled English in Belgrade). More Macedonian reggaeton, which, let's be honest here has gotten them for better (2006) or worse (2005) to the final. Of course, this year they can't totally rely on friendly votes due to the new 2 qualifier system. Anyway, Adrian & Mr. String of Consonants (MSoC) caper about dressed like newspaper boys (is Europe going through some sort of 1930s-50s nostalgia right now? It would seem like that would be an era not all that fondly remembered especially in Europe) while Tamara does her best Elena Risteska impersonation--minus the booty shaking. Next!
  • Georgia: Camels, deserts, enigmatic looking children of all shades. If the title didn't indicate it already, this is a song that will either: a) shame us all for being self-centered while the world goes A over T, b) string a bunch of greeting card phrases together like a fundraising campaign mailer, or c) both. It's C here. For added guilt factor, it's being sung by a blind woman. Diana sports glasses so big and dark that you wonder if she's not actually blind as much as blinded. Musically, the song is actually quite good. Lyrically, it's a piece of maudlin exploitative crap, which to be honest with you, I'm already had my fill of as 2008 is a US national election year.
  • Germany: No Angels (aka Wilde Orchidee, if that is the correct German translation) at Countdown Grand Prix. Yes, these girls are some of Germany's biggest stars. Yes, the song is very Top 20 friendly. Yes, it's also not bad, even quite catchy. All that said, those are some ropey vocals and some trashy dresses. I am no fashionista by any stretch of the imagination, but I know this much: sometimes the more you wear, the more hooker-like you look, and those girls look like they'll "love you long time" for 10 euros.  It's EuroVision, frauleins!
  • Greece: Speaking of looking trashy, New York's own Kalomira is representing Greece. Since the Macedonians are not shaking their booty this year, the Greeks have taken over that responsibility. Kalo doesn't so much sing this song inasmuch as exhale it through her nose. Her singing voice is just too nasal and threatening to annoy the daylights out of anyone who tries to make it through the entire 3 minutes. (FYI: I actually like the song, just not her singing style!) As for the video, it seems to be a very blatant cross/knockoff of Beyonce's Green Light (itself a knockoff of those old Robert Palmer videos) and anyone of New Order's videos from the late 1980s. Kalo's certainly got the hooker wear in tow and the lyrics seems to imply that she's going to sleep with anyone who has her "$ecret Combination," even if she herself doesn't know her own price or that she's even on sale. Ponder that.
  • Hungary: Given Hungary's status as Europe's capitol of porn, it is a pleasant surprise that Csezy isn't going for the streetwalker look. In fact, she's gone all Japanese for the first part, and then--you guessed it--1930s glamour. The song (which really should be sped up, because otherwise it sounds a decade or two too late for 2008) is nothing to write home about, but the video is actually quite striking without being obvious about it. That said, what is the significance of the Doberman running?
Top 3 videos for this round, in my view:
  1. France
  2. Hungary
  3. Georgia 
There is a HUGE ocean-sized gap between #2 and #3, by the way.

And to think, I haven't even begun to hit the controversial entries (Ireland and Spain) yet.

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

The Hikaruland ESC 2008 Preview Reviews

This time via webcam.

Albania to Cyprus. The Czechs will have to wait since Eurovision.tv seemed to not want to play the video.
(The hat is on because I had the window open for some fresh air.)






Update: I've seen the Czech entry, which basically is the national final performance: Tereza capers about in short dress while dancers shimmy and a bunch of gruff looking men play backup. Very by-the-numbers, and not all that distinctive.

Friday, March 21, 2008

Pick Which Horrifies You The Most

A) Al Roker has 20 shows in the development.

Or

B) The content of those 20 shows in development by Al Roker.

The cutest advocates for fair elections you've ever seen

Korea's (Republic) Wonder Girls star in an advert for the upcoming assembly elections in Korea.




I gather the girls are suggesting that voters make up their own mind as opposed to being persuaded by outside forces.

If that's the point of the ad, then I hope the Wonder Girls are aware of the irony of them making that statement.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

An Absolutely Fascinating Theory

The iron law of oligarchy.

The question is this: Has it already arrived in the US or how soon will it?

I think avoidance is off the table.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Happy Ending?

It's no secret that I liked Spitzer, particularly his policies and "screw you" attitude, and that it's rather sad to see his career end like it did, but I have to admit that thinking about a Patterson administration brings a little tear of happiness to my eye.

Good luck, Governor.

Monday, March 17, 2008

Eurovision 2008: Catwoman for Sweden

No, not Jocelyn Wildenstein, but Charlotte Perelli (ex-Nilsson) won that MF-ing thing over the weekend. (I'm sorry, but the pun was too tempting.) Hero is not that bad of a song, but while it's better than the bland ABBA knock-off that she won Eurovision [almost a decade ago] with, it's no Never Let It Go nor It Hurts (even if Catwoman is busy trying to emulate Lena Ph). Catwoman is also pretty off-key.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Eurovision 2008: Oh, Portugal

Well, the best song won. Not necessarily my own personal choice, but at least the most voter-friendly song (which by the way was written--at least in part--by a non-Portuguese).

Here is the recap.



Personally, I was pulling for Ricardo Soler (although he could show at least show some emotion.)

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

Eurovision 2008: We Like San Marino

We really like San Marino. Why? After all that was said and done--internally--they chose Miodio to be their debut representatives.

I'm a big Velvet fan.

I'm an even bigger Subsonica fan.

And yes, I do also like Bluvertigo (although not so much Morgan's solo work).

So Italian electroclash goes down very well with me.

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

Further Proof That Our Puritan Heritage Is Still With Us

Without a doubt, Eliot messed up, particularly as these prostitute purchases occurred while he was an elected official sworn to uphold the law.

That said, for the love of god, you'd think he'd was eating live babies and videotaping it judging by the media reaction. Clearly this is a sign that the man is not well-liked, but who elects politicians who are nice people? (Pay attention to that last phrase if you live in a state that has yet to vote in its primary.) As I see it, the man had a great agenda (and hopefully the LG will continue it) that is now ground to a halt.

The funny thing is this, we all have tire tracks on our backside, so are these militant "HE MUST GO NOW" people trying to cover up their own pecadillos? Hard to say.

Eurovision 2008: Up Yours, Dimaland

Dima Bilan won the Russian selection over the weekend (27 songs!), but in all honesty it should have gone to Sergey Lazarev (or has Jeff Timmons decided to reveal his heretofore unknown fluency in Russian?).




And for further proof look at this.

Eurovision 2008: Go Go Aleksa

If I ran Beovizija, Beli Jablan* would already be declared the winner. Quite interesting how Aleksa damn near flings and shakes himself all over the place and Ana just sort of sits there and throws sultry looks.



*Beli Jablan translates--I believe--as "white poplar." I'm assuming this is a metaphor which is lost on those of us who do not speak fluent Serbian. That said, I don't think "Guuurl, you are F.I.E.R.C.E" is the meaning.



Update: Aleksa & Ana came 2nd--as expected--to some torchy ballad written by this year's co-host. Rules? Fairplay? Not in Beovizija, the only national final that has featured riots. Anyway: Jelena will sing her thing, the angst queens will get their cry about their lonely lives in, and Serbia will place somewhere in the mid Top 10.

I Like You Eliot, but...

You're "involved" in a prostitute ring?

Is this a McGreevey mark II thing?

Monday, March 10, 2008

Eurovision 2008: Do Warren Beatty & Dustin Hoffman still talk about THAT film?

When I say Ishtar, you say...



The chances of Antwerp 2009 grow dimmer by the second. That said, the Belgians (Walloon division) sent Sanomi, that yckiejnrpnei song that made it to 2nd in 2003 (beating even tATu at the height of their fame/hype). Not that this is even in the same league.

Did that film get a Belgian release?

Eurovision 2008: Accentuate the Positive

Zapatero & The Socialists won!!!!

(And the Spanish public chose a really piss-poor joke entry to represent them in Belgrade.)


Did I mention that Zapatero won?

Sunday, March 09, 2008

Eurovision 2008: Swing and a miss

Let's say you're Montenegro.

You just finished a semi-amicable split from former partner/parent (how Freudian!) Serbia.

Serbia won last year's Eurovision and is now hosting this year's festivities.

You didn't make it out of last year's qualifier.

So now, one would say, is the time to put on your best outfit and proceed to show the world (and your ex) just how well you are doing without them.

May I ask then, why you thought this was that song?


Friday, March 07, 2008

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Eurovision 2008: Sexpot Alert

San Marino is sending Massimo Bertacci, who quite frankly makes me think joyously lewd thoughts.

Unsurprisingly, he's singing a ballad.

Surprisingly, it's good.

Update (3/6): According to ESCtoday: Mr. Sex on legs is apparently only one of several entrants being considered to represent San Marino.

If I Ran The UK Preselection for Eurovision

Don't get me wrong, I'm very happy with the selection of Andy Abraham (and I would've voted for him, if I could), but when you think about it, why hasn't the UK ever sent an entry like Mercedes Club?*




*Finalist for the 2008 Icelandic preselection.

Sunday, March 02, 2008

Ms. Amuro Finally Gets It Right

The final part of the Namie Amuro/Vidal Sassoon 60s70s80s trilogy has been released. It's What A Feeling, but it barely sounds like Flashdance apart from the chorus. Not to mention, I don't know who would want to revive 80s hair, but I'm also not in the hair care business, nor do I have an inkling as to what Japanese hair trends in the 80s were. (If the anime at the time is any inkling, the hair was BIG.)

That said, of all the videos, this is the one that seems to--no pun intended--hit all the right notes.

Thursday, February 28, 2008

Wednesday Jukebox Loves Enka

Kiyoshi Hikawa has his appeal, but he's no match--in my opinion--for Jero, Japan's first black enka singer.


The video is a bit too cute in contrasting urban style with enka singing, but Jero definitely has got an amazing voice and it definitely doesn't hurt that he is hot as hell.

Tuesday, February 26, 2008

It Sounds Admirable, but...

Two organisations are trying to increase the amount of gay black politicians, according to 365gay.

I'm all for it, although I think they have their work cut out for them. It certainly would be an improvement on the current situation. Just no Traynhams or Capeharts, please.

Monday, February 25, 2008

Monday Jukebox Goes Euro(Vision) as well

Ukraine goes disco again...this time with a woman. Now this is an entry which attacks the stage, and you know that is always welcome with me!




Ani Lorak's winning song is another Kirkorov production (he of Not Dima Bilan fame and de facto drag queen), but I have no trouble looking past that.

Sunday Jukebox Goes Euro(vision)

Do not adjust your computer, this is the Irish entry for this year...I kind of like it.

Thursday, February 21, 2008

Wednesday Jukebox Just Won't Let It Go

The camptastic music video for Afro-Dite's Never Let It Go




And the 2002 performance at Eurovision



Can MF 2008 top that? I don't think so.

There is No There There

So, I'm looking at his LGBT proposals and his African American appeal, and I feel nothing.

I feel no transformative experience.

I still see the man who will not and has not apologised for allying himself publicly with McClurkin.

I still see the man who tries to convince people that guilt can be taken away by a tick in the voting booth.

I still see a man that expects me to vote for him on the basis of shared pigmentation.

There is something missing, and all I see is a sepia McGovern at the moment.

Wednesday, February 20, 2008

I Thought We Answered The Exit Polls Question

2% reporting, polls shut for only 27 minutes and they're making calls?

Update: Obama appears to have won Ozaukee County.

Based on my many years living here, this was definitely not a vote for him as a candidate, but a vote for who they feel McCain can slaughter in November (open primary, remember), because the residents here do not believe in "change."

Meanwhile in Mequon...

I did my civic duty...


It's Not Like It Was Unexpected

But still, the news is a bit of a surprise...

Tuesday, February 19, 2008

In The Land of Milk and Primaries

That certain media darling is running ads nonstop here. He's been calling my house sounding like a Jehovah's Witness too.

And every time I hear his voice or see those ads this is the image I get in my head.



In case you're curious about the translation, Miyachannel has it...even more saccharine.

It will be quite awhile before I can start listening to DBSK again.

Monday, February 18, 2008

Sunday Jukebox: Smoking, Sensuality, and Violence

I could go all arty and analytical and try to explain why this is a particularly amazing movie sequence, but in all honesty, I'll let it do the talking, gyrating, and menacing looks.



For more information on Omkara, here's the Wikipedia page, and I recommend Fantasies of a Bollywood Love Thief by Stephen Alter.

Sunday, February 17, 2008

I Still Feel Funny About South Africa

...in terms of acceptance.

This story (courtesy of Rod 2.0) only adds fuel to those thoughts.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

From the "Sometimes The Obvious Needs To Be Restated" Department

Bigotry is hard to get rid of beyond the surface level.

How terribly mind-blowing, although I shouldn't really be that flip about it.

Yet, in all honesty, is this really that shocking to those of us outside the demographic majority?

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

No More Happy Endings

Let me tell you a secret: I rarely cry.

Not so much that I'm devoid of a heart, but it's just that it is easy to see clear manipulation when you've studied writing and media theory for several years.

But it's the good and skilled writing that looks past those cliches (or at least manipulates the cliches themselves) to create something that is powerful and moving.

Here are some examples:

Torchwood: I like the occasional sci-fi, but I wouldn't say that it's a stalwart in my favourite genres. That said, this past Saturday's episode hit me hard. Although this is a common trait in UK and foreign television in general, it is very rare that Americans are exposed to endings that aren't happy, or at least happy with a bow wrapped on it. The Unit nearly went there this current season with the death of Hector (Demore Barnes) , but The Unit got their revenge and now Charles (Michael Irby, but I can't remember when they ever gave his character's name) is going to walk off towards a happy ending with Hector's girlfriend. Contrast that with the Pyrrhic victory in "To The Last Man", even if Tommy somehow comes back, it's hard to change the underlying tone that every single member of Torchwood is--for lack of a better term--fucked by their fate. A tone which Davies--as creator, and one must assume a relatively involved one, since this is UK television--has woven since the very first episode.

Orange Road: I Want To Return To That Day (aka the first movie) : Here's an interesting concept, going into the movie, the creators knew that the audience (at least the fans) had the ending figured out: Kyosuke breaks up with Hikaru. So the skill comes from how this transpires...and it is brutal. The eager-to-please Kyosuke has to act like a prick, and not just callous, but full-on, I-Don't-Care-About-Your-Feelings cold, and it makes you rethink everything that you read in the manga, saw on the TV show, and I just felt like I lost a bit of innocence. The scary thing is that is exactly the point of the film. (We just won't talk about how this brilliant ending is totally negated by the movie sequel.)

The last two episodes of Evangelion: I've already applauded Evangelion in terms of writing, but now I want to zoom in on the emotional impact of its final two episodes. Basically here you have a character in the throes of what appears to be an emotional meltdown (I'm not going to even begin to describe The Human Instrumentality Project save for calling it "everybody becomes one big gumbo") as he questions himself and his relationships. Quite honestly, The End of Evangelion confuses it more, but in the TV ending, we get the emotional connection as it is presented not in terms of what is literally happens, but what it feels like to Shinji, and for the vast majority of us who felt inadequate as preteens and teenagers it cut like a knife, even though it seems like the TV ending is relatively happy ("I Love Myself Unconditionally"), the real cruel fact is this: Just as Shinji comes to this realisation, he becomes nothing at all. (By the way, Evangelion episode 24 is highly recommended too.)

If indeed the strike is over, then those who are writing should take this as a chance to re-examine themselves and their relationship to their work. I'm a believer that all stories have already been told, but they have not been told from all perspectives. There is nothing truly ground-breaking in any of these examples at their core, but what makes them noteworthy in my mind is their presentation.

Trust that the public/network can weather the occasional sad ending if it is believable. We owe you that much.

Monday, February 11, 2008

With Supporters Like This...


...who needs enemies






The Shepard Fairey poster in support of Barack Obama:





And a classic (read: propaganda) poster of Josef Stalin:

Friday, February 08, 2008

In the land of Angels: They Paved Tomorrowland and put up God Knows What

No PeopleMover.

No Carousel of Progress. (Although I'm surprised that the Carousel got turfed in 1974 for "America Sings." I barely recall that, so I must remember the Disney World Carousel as opposed to the Disneyland one.)

No Adventure Through Inner Space.

Just blech.

Surprisingly few sponsors though, although the rides feel considerably shorter than ever.

Yet it was my birthday and I was in Los Angeles, so really: there was no choice but to go to Disneyland.

Of the rides I did go on, I have to admit I still feel a little bit uncomfortable on Splash Mountain...and if you are or have parents/relatives of a certain age, you can understand why. I'm not at all referring to the drop itself, but the ending with the Showboat? I thought it veered dangerously into insensitivity (but quite honestly, the second they built a ride based on Song of The South, Disney knew they weren't dealing with the most controversy-free property in the Disney "vault.")

And then there's The California Adventure, which is nice and all, but if I wanted to see the Santa Monica pier, I'd go to Santa Monica.

And what is Whoopi Goldberg doing as Queen of California?

Then again, maybe I'm just getting old...er.

(By the way, thanks to Yesterland for the links)

Tuesday, February 05, 2008

In the land of Angels: Wither Good Day LA

Straight People Are Just Not That Fun To Watch In the AM

When I moved to New York and started watching Good Day New York, I actually thought it was a well-meaning but somewhat anemic version of Good Day LA: You had the elderly anchorman (Jim Ryan, who always made me think of the expressway in Chicago), the straight-talking anchorwoman (believe it or not Lyn Brown filled this slot), and the wacky weather person (Dave Price, who I reckon is probably doing some bland version of the same schtick on whatever CBS's morning show is called now). Well, that team has long since left and even though the ratings are not excellent, the new gay-infused formula certainly is an improvement.

Good Day LA hasn't changed its formula and in my view the show is now s.t.a.l.e.

Jillian Reynolds continues to do everything but her actual job of meterologist and be impressed with herself. Today, she is busy trying to make us envious of the fact that she went to the Super Bowl and took a lot of photos with FOX celebrities and went to a slew of parties. (I don't know how we can be that impressed since they keep on running the EXACT SAME PACKAGE, twice every half-hour.) She's not even doing the weather today, yet she's on the show. Even Al Roker when he goes on one of his junkets does the forecast.

Steve Edwards just looks tired with it all.

Dorothy Lucey is practically a non-entity. This may very well not be her fault, since she is for some bizarre reason covering the snow out in the mountains. (She just happens to have a crew with her?) The woman does gossip, she needs to be talking to Harvey Levin about Britney Spears not urging us to postpone that trip to Palm Springs.

The only one who seems to maintain the right balance is Tony McEwing, who is the clear heir apparent. Poor Tony however is out somewhere in the Valley doing makeovers with Jose Eber.

And they do this from 7 to 10 every weekday?

Steve Kmetko is based in Los Angeles...I'm just saying.

Monday, February 04, 2008

In the land of Angels: Day 1

Through sheer optimism and curiosity, I find myself in Los Angeles this week.

It's been 8 years since I was here last and I also find myself pondering the same thing I thought back in 2000: What am I missing?

There seems to always be some sort of secret amongst the residents here as to what the appeal is.

Is it the sunshine and constant 70 degree weather? Can't be. It barely cracked 60 today and the nights are bitterly cold.

Is it the nightlife? Granted it's Superbowl Sunday, but the pickings don't seem to be that great, and I'm in the middle of West Hollywood. (Although in all fairness, I limited myself to places within walking distance, since I like a drink and I don't like waiting for cabs.)

What I reckon it is, is that Los Angeles is for dreamers. I don't mean that as an insult, but just that this is a place where people seem to come to in order to live their fantasy, no matter what steps in reality they have to do in order to acheive it.

As I type this, I'm looking at this week's Frontier Magazine and there are a plethora of adverts for personal trainers promising great results and physique--which they may very well be able to deliver on--but the choice in photos of these trainers suggest that if you want to look like them, then you'll have to become very friendly with a syringe, perhaps even moreso than any barbell.

The magazine itself opens with lavish full-page adverts of plastic surgeons offering liposuction in countless ways and the fantasy that with 4 figures and 0% financing, you too, can be in love with your outside.

Not that New York is better, it just handled in covert, ironic way. The fantasies are promised, but I would hazard a guess that the implication is that everyone would know that you are enhanced by a person who knows how to wield a blade.

In Los Angeles, because you really have to chose to see people on a daily basis, that conceit is hidden, and therefore rendered irrelevant: who cares about the journey as long as you reach your destination?

Indeed, is it a bad thing to leave a corpse that makes mourners consider necrophilia?

Saturday, February 02, 2008

Catlike Closet Queen Claims Impartiality

How else can you describe this quote from Shepard Smith?

"There's a perception out there that we have a horse in the race, that we're the right-wing channel...You know, man, (what is this, 1978?--Hikaru) I work here. Hannity's right-wing and he's proud of it, and we have some conservative viewers, but our news is just the news . . . or I wouldn't be able to sleep at night."

Fortunately, I'll be missing all this crossover coverage, because I will be trying to remember where on Sunset Boulevard, Ralph's is so I can get a bottle of plum wine.

Notes from Milwaukee

Firstly, who would buy exercise equipment from a man who is overweight?

Secondly, what does it say about the state of the area's economy that the majority of the adverts on local television are for the following:
  • Injury lawyers
  • Deep discount stores and programs
  • Weight-loss schemes