Just listen...
And I'm generally not one to fawn about vocal gymnastics, but this knocked my socks off.
Tuesday, April 03, 2007
Partly Shameless Plug
My best friend Garrett is appearing on this week's new Law & Order: Criminal Intent.
Do watch!
Do watch!
Eurovision 2007: I Know I'm Lyric-Sensitive, but really?
Now it's hardly a secret that I really like this year's Russian entry, but alas, the Russian Eurovision curse of atrocious lyrics strikes again.
Here's a sampling (courtesy of The Diggiloo Thrush) :
Gotta tease you nasty guy
So take it, don't be shy
Put your cherry on my cake
And taste my cherry pie
As anyone who remembers Warrant's big hit can tell you, "cherry pie" is slang for a part of the female southern anatomy. So one must ask, what is a person's "cake?" Based on the refrain, I would hazard a guess that they are referring to the posterior. If that is the case, then I believe we have the first lesbian anal sex reference in Eurovision.
Like the Silver Girls have any idea what they are singing about.
Open note to Russian Eurovision composers:
Please have a native English speaker go over your lyrics. You come up with these great musical compositions and then have them shot to hell because the lyrics are basically absurd.
Since when do asses "spin?" They swing, they sway, they do not go 360 degrees on any normal human being.
By the way, what's with the lead singer calling her cohorts "bitches?" I know the other two are really only there for show, but seriously, give them at least a modicum of respect.
Here's a sampling (courtesy of The Diggiloo Thrush) :
Gotta tease you nasty guy
So take it, don't be shy
Put your cherry on my cake
And taste my cherry pie
As anyone who remembers Warrant's big hit can tell you, "cherry pie" is slang for a part of the female southern anatomy. So one must ask, what is a person's "cake?" Based on the refrain, I would hazard a guess that they are referring to the posterior. If that is the case, then I believe we have the first lesbian anal sex reference in Eurovision.
Like the Silver Girls have any idea what they are singing about.
Open note to Russian Eurovision composers:
Please have a native English speaker go over your lyrics. You come up with these great musical compositions and then have them shot to hell because the lyrics are basically absurd.
Since when do asses "spin?" They swing, they sway, they do not go 360 degrees on any normal human being.
By the way, what's with the lead singer calling her cohorts "bitches?" I know the other two are really only there for show, but seriously, give them at least a modicum of respect.
Monday, April 02, 2007
Are You Sure This Isn't A Joke?
Tommy "Wimpy Ex-Wisconsin Governor" Thompson is apparently entering the presidential race.
Why? I do not know.
The man is forever etched in my head as the fool who came running back to Wisconsin--tears streaming down his face--after basically getting his ass handed to him in Washington.
And he thinks he could run the country?
Why? I do not know.
The man is forever etched in my head as the fool who came running back to Wisconsin--tears streaming down his face--after basically getting his ass handed to him in Washington.
And he thinks he could run the country?
Saturday, March 31, 2007
Saturday Jukebox Warms Up for the Eurovision 2007 Video Preview Massacre
Now that we're in the drought between National Final season and the actual contest in May, I thought that I'd put in a bit of a teaser for the upcoming annual Hikaruland Preview Video Hitlist--I mean--Review.
Quite honestly, I'm not expecting to dish out that much vitrol this year. I will say that the one of the two frontrunners in the video stakes for me is Russia (although I don't think anyone is going to get close to brillance that was La Vissi's video last year).
That said, I really think that the Silver Girls are really Russia's answer to the Pussycat Dolls in that only one can sing while the rest just look pretty and talk along with the beat. (We all remember how different Yulia's live performance in 2004 was from what the preview promised, don't we?)
Quite honestly, I'm not expecting to dish out that much vitrol this year. I will say that the one of the two frontrunners in the video stakes for me is Russia (although I don't think anyone is going to get close to brillance that was La Vissi's video last year).
That said, I really think that the Silver Girls are really Russia's answer to the Pussycat Dolls in that only one can sing while the rest just look pretty and talk along with the beat. (We all remember how different Yulia's live performance in 2004 was from what the preview promised, don't we?)
When Bad Theatre Tries To Hide Its Tracks
Comrades, I give you The Matthew Passion.
Here we have a relatively interesting idea with the Passion of Christ interspersed with the story of Matthew Shepard and the story of a middle-aged HIV+ man.
Now how do they chose to market it?
Shirtless men caked in sweat with muscles taut and bulging.
The Matthew Shepard story is not about sexiness. It's about bigotry, ignorance, and fear.
So is the Passion of the Christ.
Therefore, one must ask creator Phil Hall what his real intentions were with this piece. Did he want to make a statement or did he just want to create masturbatory fluff (no pun intended) for those too embarassed to get porn in their own homes? I do not necessarily blame Phil for all of this (although I must say that all writers must accept that they are at the nexus of their work, be it good or bad), because even if the script has descriptions last seen in Afterhours, someone had to put that image out onstage, someone had to chose that way of marketing it, and someone had to do the casting with a certain mindset.
And most embarassingly, someone--and this is most likely Phil (since this is a play with music)--had to think that adding a song called You Need A Bitch Slap was required.
I am quite tempted to say that the song would be best directed at its creator rather than one of the characters.
Here we have a relatively interesting idea with the Passion of Christ interspersed with the story of Matthew Shepard and the story of a middle-aged HIV+ man.
Now how do they chose to market it?
Shirtless men caked in sweat with muscles taut and bulging.
The Matthew Shepard story is not about sexiness. It's about bigotry, ignorance, and fear.
So is the Passion of the Christ.
Therefore, one must ask creator Phil Hall what his real intentions were with this piece. Did he want to make a statement or did he just want to create masturbatory fluff (no pun intended) for those too embarassed to get porn in their own homes? I do not necessarily blame Phil for all of this (although I must say that all writers must accept that they are at the nexus of their work, be it good or bad), because even if the script has descriptions last seen in Afterhours, someone had to put that image out onstage, someone had to chose that way of marketing it, and someone had to do the casting with a certain mindset.
And most embarassingly, someone--and this is most likely Phil (since this is a play with music)--had to think that adding a song called You Need A Bitch Slap was required.
I am quite tempted to say that the song would be best directed at its creator rather than one of the characters.
Friday, March 30, 2007
GLAAD to be Self-Loathing?
Both of the local New York gay newspapers have a very (and telling) story about GLAAD's exclusion of the two gay networks from their annual four-part kiss-ass--I mean gala that was recently held here in New York.
That's right, the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation, our watchdog that supposedly tells the media when they screw up homophobically and applaud them when they get it right is excluding both of the 24 hour all-gay, all-the-time television networks airing in the US from its annual ceremonies that honour gay representation in the media.
The absurdity nearly speaks for itself.
I'm damn near shocked that The Blade is carrying the story, but I guess their broken clock (as in the thing that is right twice a day) department was allowed some fresh air this week. This is made even moreso interesting in that the coverage is in the Editorial section. I think this quote here (no pun intended) gets to the meat of the story:
Perhaps GLAAD could create special categories specifically for LGBT media. But by now (sic)allowing that, GLAAD might as well state that our LGBT stars and media talent are not glamorous and famous enough to make a difference—or that they won’t warrant “mainstream” attention and ticket sales.
The Blade actually taking a stance against homogenisation? Shocking, I tell you.
The Gay City News's Doug Ireland brings it all into focus by viewing this misstep/bigoted self-loathing move within the context of the state of gay television. Ireland is biting and unfailing in his criticism, and the fact of the matter is that for the most part it is warranted.
Some of the greatest and most creative minds working in media today are gay and why aren't they being allowed to flourish within this new media context? Some might say it's because they're afraid of being pigeon-holed, but I don't necessarily buy that. I think that if those people--whoever they are--see that really amazing things can be created and are allowed to do them without fear of being too uncommercial or too gay-specific, then we can have better gay networks.
Is it that difficult to do a miniseries of The City & The Pillar, people? Seriously.
Where did gay sensiblity get lost in the rush to get gay content?
We need more than just the coming-out stories and the AIDS tragedy stories. We need quirkiness, irony, sarcasm, and "popcorn" that is more than just bland, vacant looking twinks wandering around in briefs. Comrades, we need to show the wit and smirks that fuel the creativity.
You know who I think gets this, is Stephen Macias of here Networks, who wrote a blistering and truth telling response to GLAAD (lead by I-got-mine Log Cabinette Neil Giuliano, FYI) , which you can read in full--bizarrely enough--over at The Blade. I just want to highlight one of his bullet points that applies not just to GLAAD's shameful ignorance but to the power of good, quality gay media in general:
Inspiring closeted gay Americans to come out and be themselves is one of the most important results that fair, accurate, and inclusive media can have on American culture. While you can legislate equal protection under the law, it is television that has the ability to change the hearts and minds of all people, including gays and lesbians. Gay television now comes into the homes of millions of Americans with programming that not only entertains, but also inspires and gives people confidence to come out of the closet, be themselves and lend their proud voice to change. Seeing themselves and their stories being told on screen is a powerful and is helping to change lives across America.
You tell 'em.
That's right, the Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation, our watchdog that supposedly tells the media when they screw up homophobically and applaud them when they get it right is excluding both of the 24 hour all-gay, all-the-time television networks airing in the US from its annual ceremonies that honour gay representation in the media.
The absurdity nearly speaks for itself.
I'm damn near shocked that The Blade is carrying the story, but I guess their broken clock (as in the thing that is right twice a day) department was allowed some fresh air this week. This is made even moreso interesting in that the coverage is in the Editorial section. I think this quote here (no pun intended) gets to the meat of the story:
Perhaps GLAAD could create special categories specifically for LGBT media. But by now (sic)allowing that, GLAAD might as well state that our LGBT stars and media talent are not glamorous and famous enough to make a difference—or that they won’t warrant “mainstream” attention and ticket sales.
The Blade actually taking a stance against homogenisation? Shocking, I tell you.
The Gay City News's Doug Ireland brings it all into focus by viewing this misstep/bigoted self-loathing move within the context of the state of gay television. Ireland is biting and unfailing in his criticism, and the fact of the matter is that for the most part it is warranted.
Some of the greatest and most creative minds working in media today are gay and why aren't they being allowed to flourish within this new media context? Some might say it's because they're afraid of being pigeon-holed, but I don't necessarily buy that. I think that if those people--whoever they are--see that really amazing things can be created and are allowed to do them without fear of being too uncommercial or too gay-specific, then we can have better gay networks.
Is it that difficult to do a miniseries of The City & The Pillar, people? Seriously.
Where did gay sensiblity get lost in the rush to get gay content?
We need more than just the coming-out stories and the AIDS tragedy stories. We need quirkiness, irony, sarcasm, and "popcorn" that is more than just bland, vacant looking twinks wandering around in briefs. Comrades, we need to show the wit and smirks that fuel the creativity.
You know who I think gets this, is Stephen Macias of here Networks, who wrote a blistering and truth telling response to GLAAD (lead by I-got-mine Log Cabinette Neil Giuliano, FYI) , which you can read in full--bizarrely enough--over at The Blade. I just want to highlight one of his bullet points that applies not just to GLAAD's shameful ignorance but to the power of good, quality gay media in general:
Inspiring closeted gay Americans to come out and be themselves is one of the most important results that fair, accurate, and inclusive media can have on American culture. While you can legislate equal protection under the law, it is television that has the ability to change the hearts and minds of all people, including gays and lesbians. Gay television now comes into the homes of millions of Americans with programming that not only entertains, but also inspires and gives people confidence to come out of the closet, be themselves and lend their proud voice to change. Seeing themselves and their stories being told on screen is a powerful and is helping to change lives across America.
You tell 'em.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
Tuesday Jukebox Just Wants You To Be Happy
Ah...Nona Reeves songs are perfect for mornings where you only got 4 hours of sleep.
(And yes, I'm half surprised there was a TV series for Parappa the Rapper.)
(And yes, I'm half surprised there was a TV series for Parappa the Rapper.)
Some Networks Get It, Others Don't
Dennis Ayers has an excellent article over at AfterElton which evaluates Gay representation on each of the broadcast networks.
Interestingly, there are some unexpected results. While I am not surprised that ABC leads with an A-, the CW getting a B- (albeit based on its WB history) , and NBC getting a C (I figured they would net a C-), is a somewhat of a surprise. Likewise, CBS and Fox sharing a third place C+ is equally surprising.
Nonetheless, great reading.
Interestingly, there are some unexpected results. While I am not surprised that ABC leads with an A-, the CW getting a B- (albeit based on its WB history) , and NBC getting a C (I figured they would net a C-), is a somewhat of a surprise. Likewise, CBS and Fox sharing a third place C+ is equally surprising.
Nonetheless, great reading.
Answering Referral Questions
I do love the referrals I get here.
- Lucy Noland: Gone from WNYW. Why? I don't know, but probably was a monetary dispute. New York TV news can be so acrimonious. Personally, I liked her, but I don't mind if Lynda Lopez takes over her job (though I bet it will be Anne Craig).
- Eric Braate: In Houston. Is he becoming the local weatherman version of Anderson Cooper? I'm beginning to think so.
- Lyrics to Laura's Sunflowers from Eurolaul 2007: For those who love the blandness, you can mosey on down to ETV's Eurolaul site and start transcribing.
- Who is most likely to win Eurovision 2007?: (in no particular order) Belgium, Cyprus, Russia, Spain, Switzerland, with France as a dark horse.
Sunday, March 18, 2007
Eurovision 2007:And Now We Wait
The UK selected today and...well, I'll just say that if Scooch had top 20 hits in 1998, then they must've flown right past my TOTP viewing self.
I was for Big Brovaz in all honesty, since Cyndi's ballad did nothing for me and the bar is always raised extremely high when it comes to me liking a ballad.
Nonetheless, this is a year where the middle is rising and I guess that Scooch is the middle in this case and in a Scooch versus Cyndi superfinal, I'd vote for camp over Sominex.
That's the funny thing about 100% televoting, you have no one to blame but yourself or your neighbours. (49% of the US electorate has been living with that for the past 8 years.) All that said, I wouldn't be surprised if the UK Selection goes internal or 1 singer/6 songs next year.
Anyway, all songs competing in this year's Eurovision are now all known, and we come into the eye of the Eurovision hurricane where nothing happens save for remixing and shooting the stray video or two.
I'm going to stand by my Eurovision goes West prediction, buoyed by the fact that I really like the Russian entry (even though it's a Sugababes/Pussycat Doll knockoff with nonsensical lyrics--then again what Russian entry has made sense post-free language? Why else would they have a visual free-for-all with the staging every year?) and songs that I really like never ever do better than 4th.
If I was a Belgian, French, German, Spanish, or Swiss television executive, then I'd tell the accounting department to start crunching some numbers.
Interestingly, I think this year the Final will actually be more entertaining than the Qualifier.
I was for Big Brovaz in all honesty, since Cyndi's ballad did nothing for me and the bar is always raised extremely high when it comes to me liking a ballad.
Nonetheless, this is a year where the middle is rising and I guess that Scooch is the middle in this case and in a Scooch versus Cyndi superfinal, I'd vote for camp over Sominex.
That's the funny thing about 100% televoting, you have no one to blame but yourself or your neighbours. (49% of the US electorate has been living with that for the past 8 years.) All that said, I wouldn't be surprised if the UK Selection goes internal or 1 singer/6 songs next year.
Anyway, all songs competing in this year's Eurovision are now all known, and we come into the eye of the Eurovision hurricane where nothing happens save for remixing and shooting the stray video or two.
I'm going to stand by my Eurovision goes West prediction, buoyed by the fact that I really like the Russian entry (even though it's a Sugababes/Pussycat Doll knockoff with nonsensical lyrics--then again what Russian entry has made sense post-free language? Why else would they have a visual free-for-all with the staging every year?) and songs that I really like never ever do better than 4th.
If I was a Belgian, French, German, Spanish, or Swiss television executive, then I'd tell the accounting department to start crunching some numbers.
Interestingly, I think this year the Final will actually be more entertaining than the Qualifier.
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
The Splash-View Post-Mortem: Where Is Everybody?
It's the first warm night in a long time and streets of Chelsea are...dead.
53F at night and virtually no one is out and about, whereas only a week or so ago when it was cold, everywhere was--if not necessarily packed--full of action.
I have my theories:
53F at night and virtually no one is out and about, whereas only a week or so ago when it was cold, everywhere was--if not necessarily packed--full of action.
I have my theories:
- The Rapture happened and we're either saved or left behind.
- People are nervous about the upcoming eclipse (thanks astrobarry)
- That many people were at the Roxy closing?
- That many people are prepping for St. Patrick's Day?
- The Depression started without any final warning.
- New York finally got too expensive.
Inquiring minds want to know.
Sunday, March 11, 2007
Eurovision 2007: Who Escapes The Qualifier of Death?
"Tonight" the Czech Republic and Portugal decided (the latter with a webcast that was very shaky over here, to be honest), leaving only Hungary left to show their goods, if you will.
At the risk of jumping the gun, I'm going to issue the first of several speculations about who's going to get out of the Qualifier and who is going to stay.
Now there are 10 slots open for the Qualifier entries in the final and 28 entries in the Qualifier. All this adds up to a virtual bloodbath.
Let's get the likely contenders over with.
Probably going to get through, provided everything goes alright:
At the risk of jumping the gun, I'm going to issue the first of several speculations about who's going to get out of the Qualifier and who is going to stay.
Now there are 10 slots open for the Qualifier entries in the final and 28 entries in the Qualifier. All this adds up to a virtual bloodbath.
Let's get the likely contenders over with.
Probably going to get through, provided everything goes alright:
- Serbia (I don't care for it, but it will go through)
- Cyprus
- Switzerland
- Andorra
- Belarus
- Belgium
Next, the shaky ones that have perhaps a less than 50% chance of getting through:
- Macedonia (yes, I put Macedonia down as shaky because the competition is that rough)
- Poland
- Georgia
That final slot will be filled--by the skin of their teeth--with one of these six.
- Netherlands
- Turkey
- Bulgaria
- Estonia
- Israel (controversy is good, very good, for an entry)
- Portugal (yes, primarily because I'm viewing it in the context of the others, but if it doesn't get a strong makeover expect Slovenia, Montenegro, or the Czechs to take their place)
Personally, I think the Final is going to be even more vicious, with Spain the likely winner in a photo finish.
Saturday, March 10, 2007
Friday Jukebox likes this
No way in hell will Ukraine win in Helsinki, but I do like Verka. It's absurd, funny, and damn catchy.
That's how you do a comedy number.
Doesn't change the fact that Eurovision is still going West, no matter what the Russian entry is.
Germany might even produce the shock winner.
That's how you do a comedy number.
Doesn't change the fact that Eurovision is still going West, no matter what the Russian entry is.
Germany might even produce the shock winner.
Friday, March 09, 2007
Thursday Jukebox is so Negativ
Well, Negativ didn't win Beovizija (I'm not commenting on the winner today), but you put on a good show.
Just one tiny little suggestion for Ivana: You might want to avoid the Joan Crawford look.
Still, a good follow up to your 2004 showing.
Although Zbunjena was probably the better song of the two, in my view.
Just one tiny little suggestion for Ivana: You might want to avoid the Joan Crawford look.
Still, a good follow up to your 2004 showing.
Although Zbunjena was probably the better song of the two, in my view.
The 727th Post: About That Controversy
(In case you don't know of what I'm referring to.)
He knew good and hell well that all of this was out there.
He is also proof that being smart does not actually equal being savvy.
Expect to see him writing for The Blade after his book tanks, and probably doing some softcore photo spread a year or two later.
Interesting how everything comes pre-packaged these days.
Just like a palindrome.
He knew good and hell well that all of this was out there.
He is also proof that being smart does not actually equal being savvy.
Expect to see him writing for The Blade after his book tanks, and probably doing some softcore photo spread a year or two later.
Interesting how everything comes pre-packaged these days.
Just like a palindrome.
Thursday, March 08, 2007
Eurovision 2007: Based on what we have so far
We are going West this year.
Oh yes, we are going West (or South).
(I have to say South because Cyprus & Malta are strong.)
This is a year where the "middle" entries have been rising to win the national finals, and amongst all of these strongest is from Spain, but even the internal selections from Belgium and Switzerland have broad appeal.
Hell, even Andorra stands a serious chance this year.
Remaining to be heard: Turkey, Hungary, Russia, Portugal (major dark horse this year), Ukraine.
Remaining to be decided: Serbia (along with Bulgaria, the only possible spoilers to a Western win), Sweden (it is not their year), Ukraine, the UK (another dark horse), Portugal, and the Czech Republic.
Oh yes, we are going West (or South).
(I have to say South because Cyprus & Malta are strong.)
This is a year where the "middle" entries have been rising to win the national finals, and amongst all of these strongest is from Spain, but even the internal selections from Belgium and Switzerland have broad appeal.
Hell, even Andorra stands a serious chance this year.
Remaining to be heard: Turkey, Hungary, Russia, Portugal (major dark horse this year), Ukraine.
Remaining to be decided: Serbia (along with Bulgaria, the only possible spoilers to a Western win), Sweden (it is not their year), Ukraine, the UK (another dark horse), Portugal, and the Czech Republic.
Monday, March 05, 2007
Eurovision 2007: This is a debut!
Georgia (the one that Sherman didn't march through) picked its song over the weekend and boy is it a piece of work.
I mean that in a complimentary way, as Sopho has an amazing voice and the song has an equally great arrangement--even the lyrics are quite meditative (although these days I'm happy for anything beyond "I love you, you love me" when it comes to anything midtempo or slower).
Take a look at the video:
Now, here's the flip side. Y'see the staging of the song at the Georgian National Final is a bit strange. I'm all for performance art, but...well:
Ambitious? Yes. Avantgarde? Yes. OTT? Possibly. I hope they whip it into sleeker shape by May as Georgia is only 1 of the 2 entries so far that have the best chance of taking the trophy anywhere east of Switzerland.
All that said, I'd be surprised if Georgia doesn't make it into the Final.
I mean that in a complimentary way, as Sopho has an amazing voice and the song has an equally great arrangement--even the lyrics are quite meditative (although these days I'm happy for anything beyond "I love you, you love me" when it comes to anything midtempo or slower).
Take a look at the video:
Now, here's the flip side. Y'see the staging of the song at the Georgian National Final is a bit strange. I'm all for performance art, but...well:
Ambitious? Yes. Avantgarde? Yes. OTT? Possibly. I hope they whip it into sleeker shape by May as Georgia is only 1 of the 2 entries so far that have the best chance of taking the trophy anywhere east of Switzerland.
All that said, I'd be surprised if Georgia doesn't make it into the Final.
Sunday, March 04, 2007
The Splash Post-Mortem: Blame It On the Eclipse?
I'd like to blame it on the eclipse, but sometimes stupidity is just stupidity.
Y'see, I'm celebrating alcohol before I go on a dry fortnight.
So I want to enjoy my Godiva Orange Juice, and I did, courtesy of the auld friend over at the near bar.
I cannot say the same for his new compatriot over at the far bar.
Frequent readers know that I have limited patience when it comes to slow service at a bar that is not busy. I reckon that anyone else would be the same.
I place my empty glass at the bar and smile at the bartender.
No response as he goes to chat up some random guy (possible sugar daddy?).
I smile and wave at him.
No response as he checks on the others to my left.
I smile, wave, and say "hello" in a kind, non-sarky way.
No response as he goes back to the Sugar Daddy.
I start coughing (unintentionally, mind you).
He arches one eyebrow and then realises that while he's been flitting between everyone else, I've been sitting there waiting to be asked my next drink.
Some days, I wish I could just put on a mask.
Y'see, I'm celebrating alcohol before I go on a dry fortnight.
So I want to enjoy my Godiva Orange Juice, and I did, courtesy of the auld friend over at the near bar.
I cannot say the same for his new compatriot over at the far bar.
Frequent readers know that I have limited patience when it comes to slow service at a bar that is not busy. I reckon that anyone else would be the same.
I place my empty glass at the bar and smile at the bartender.
No response as he goes to chat up some random guy (possible sugar daddy?).
I smile and wave at him.
No response as he checks on the others to my left.
I smile, wave, and say "hello" in a kind, non-sarky way.
No response as he goes back to the Sugar Daddy.
I start coughing (unintentionally, mind you).
He arches one eyebrow and then realises that while he's been flitting between everyone else, I've been sitting there waiting to be asked my next drink.
Some days, I wish I could just put on a mask.
Wednesday, February 28, 2007
The View-The Gym-Splash Post-Mortem: We Like Free
Initially, I thought this would be an all View night: Just me having my Twisted Teas and watching music videos while assorted characters came in and out.
Not quite.
It seems I have become--without realising it--the Tuesday night drinking buddy of a man I shall call J. J is 4 years my Junior and perhaps the embodiment of attributes that used to be mine. J is also a major bear-chaser. (NB: I am not. I like hairy chests and all that, but I'm too tied to mental attraction for it to be the be-all end-all.) J also talks very fast and 90% about himself. Nonetheless, J's observations are quite humourous, so it doesn't come across as completely annoying.
What is interesting about drinking with a bear chaser, is that of course you attract bears. I was catching up with J when his two bear acquaintances (both in their early 40s) came in. The short one--Napoleon, if you will--could not get over the fact that The View has a "Boycott M&M/Mars" sign out in front. Personally, I thought the advert and website were offensive, so I support them on it.
Not Napoleon.
He just went on and on and on about how stupid it was to have that sign up there. Since J knew him better than I, I kept my opinions to myself, while J switched the subject to whatever was running through his mind. Did that stop Napoleon? Like hell it did.
I ought to start making a list of things I should do, if decorum hadn't done a number on me:
#1? Shut Napoleon up.
Since J was wired via liquor, we found ourselves in The Gym which looks eerily like Boom in Milwaukee but with the screens tuned to sports. Even more hilarious, J & I were the biggest guys in the place. Everybody else was either a hag or a reed-thin twink.
Finally escaping, I made my way to Splash--where everybody knows me...under a pseudonym. I cannot quite figure out how I get free entry, but with the admission of a t-shirt, I apparently got free coat check.
And let's not even mention the Long Island Tea discount.
Not quite.
It seems I have become--without realising it--the Tuesday night drinking buddy of a man I shall call J. J is 4 years my Junior and perhaps the embodiment of attributes that used to be mine. J is also a major bear-chaser. (NB: I am not. I like hairy chests and all that, but I'm too tied to mental attraction for it to be the be-all end-all.) J also talks very fast and 90% about himself. Nonetheless, J's observations are quite humourous, so it doesn't come across as completely annoying.
What is interesting about drinking with a bear chaser, is that of course you attract bears. I was catching up with J when his two bear acquaintances (both in their early 40s) came in. The short one--Napoleon, if you will--could not get over the fact that The View has a "Boycott M&M/Mars" sign out in front. Personally, I thought the advert and website were offensive, so I support them on it.
Not Napoleon.
He just went on and on and on about how stupid it was to have that sign up there. Since J knew him better than I, I kept my opinions to myself, while J switched the subject to whatever was running through his mind. Did that stop Napoleon? Like hell it did.
I ought to start making a list of things I should do, if decorum hadn't done a number on me:
#1? Shut Napoleon up.
Since J was wired via liquor, we found ourselves in The Gym which looks eerily like Boom in Milwaukee but with the screens tuned to sports. Even more hilarious, J & I were the biggest guys in the place. Everybody else was either a hag or a reed-thin twink.
Finally escaping, I made my way to Splash--where everybody knows me...under a pseudonym. I cannot quite figure out how I get free entry, but with the admission of a t-shirt, I apparently got free coat check.
And let's not even mention the Long Island Tea discount.
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